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Relationships

Quick, stress free wedding ideas

13 replies

Beachbabe1 · 04/05/2021 12:35

Hi all. What is the easiest way to get married. No guests, no frills, low cost and no stress? Just my partner and I and our two children.
Has anyone done this and how do you look back on it?
We have been together for nearly 20 years, we just want to get married minus the stress and cost!
So many other things we would like to spend money on (a puppy, a family holiday, home renovations).

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DungeonKeeper · 04/05/2021 12:49

Registry office, two witnesses. That’s it.

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minniemomo · 04/05/2021 12:50

In the U.K.? Registry office is the cheapest, just need two witnesses, book a morning slot and go for lunch maybe. Another reasonable option is somewhere like Gretna Green where volume means it's reasonable.

No buy clothes second hand etc to save more

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TurquoiseDragon · 04/05/2021 13:12

Look on your local council website (might be your county council, our registry office is their responsibility). From memory, our council had fees for the initial appointments as well as for the wedding, but I reckon it was around £200 for all fees.

Will be the quickest and easiest way. And if you're near me and need a witness, I'd be happy to help.

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user4726283 · 04/05/2021 13:45

My DH & I booked a minimum price lunchtime midweek slot in the registrar's office - literally in the office - did the "giving notice" bit a few weeks before, early in the day before work (or might have been in the lunch hour).

Swore a couple of old friends from the walking club to secrecy and roped them in as witnesses.
Walked in to the registry office, got married, had a coffee, bus back.
Had a takeaway and a bottle of wine with them that evening.
Aside from a few entries in pension files etc that was it. Never mentioned it to anyone as that seemed to be the lowest stress option!

Giving notice was ?£35 each and the ceremony was ? £55 , bus fare for 4 was £14, coffees for four was similar, takeaway £35, wine £20 (iirc) so
About £210 all in?

We had been together nearly 30 years then and just wanted the legal and financial advantages (a defined benefit pension with generous provision for widows was the main motivation, though we've already made the cost back through the ability to transfer money tax free between each other and thus make use of both sets of tax allowances)

Super low stress, would definitely recommend. Among friends 2 or 3 couples have had very quiet reg office dos and none regret it!
If you are planning to let people know, it can be easier if you "elope" with the kids to somewhere far off and have a small 'do' there. Or do it quick now and blame COVID ;)
If you want to keep it on the QT bear in mind that Scottish marriages are easy to look up online and the Mormons tend to scrape up english-language records for family search.org every couple of decades...

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HoboSexualOnslow · 04/05/2021 14:03

My best friend and DPs sister were witnesses, in and out in 10 minutes. We had a civil partnership so no vows either Smile

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ChameleonKola · 04/05/2021 15:13

Register office. We had six guests, and went for lunch after at a cafe (but could have skipped that part). Just wore a nice dress from New Look that was a tenner. Cost about £400 including rings and legal costs, but again you can skip rings and do it even cheaper (we paid a bit extra to have a few songs played).

Very happy with it, was my dream wedding.

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user1471538283 · 04/05/2021 16:50

Three sets of friends had perfect stressless weddings. With one it was the Registry office with their children and two witnesses. We then all went to Pizza Hut (my choice as I thought the children would like it) for lunch. No one bought anything new to wear. I think the biggest expense was her ring because she wanted diamonds in it. It was sweet, funny and exactly what they wanted.

The next couple had been together for years. They booked the Registry office and then rang their parents to invite them. Then a meal at a local pub.

The next couple had been together 30 years and wanted to protect each other. Their solicitor said to get married rather than spend thousands on legal fees. So they had a friend each as witnesses and a lovely meal afterwards.

All these marriages have survived. Yet the one I heard of where they spend £50k lasted six months...

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user1471538283 · 04/05/2021 16:56

Another set of friends got married at Gretna Green and whilst numbers are limited I think you can have up to 30. It is very touristy though and not cheap.

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JorisBonson · 04/05/2021 17:00

We went to a little mill in Cornwall and got married in the grounds, just the 2 of us with staff as witnesses. It was beautiful and they made it totally stress free. Can PM you the info if it's of interest!

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pheasantlysuprised · 04/05/2021 17:28

We spent around 200 at the reg office ( can't remember the exact figure) it would have been less If we waited for the smaller room but we wanted the first slot after we'd given our notice to marry.

From first conversation about shall we just go and get married? To us being married was around 40 days.

Dhs work wife was one of our witnesses and dhs best friend the other. Newborn dd was with us.

We went for a nice lunch after and then told family and friends.

No rings, no music, one photo and all done in around 8 minutes.

We did have a bit of a fall out with family over it - some of them still haven't forgiven us for robbing them of a wedding but 2 years later we really don't care 🤷🏼‍♀️

We are quiet and pretty private people who dislike a fuss so it suited us .

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HoboSexualOnslow · 04/05/2021 20:05

@pheasantlysuprised

We spent around 200 at the reg office ( can't remember the exact figure) it would have been less If we waited for the smaller room but we wanted the first slot after we'd given our notice to marry.

From first conversation about shall we just go and get married? To us being married was around 40 days.

Dhs work wife was one of our witnesses and dhs best friend the other. Newborn dd was with us.

We went for a nice lunch after and then told family and friends.

No rings, no music, one photo and all done in around 8 minutes.

We did have a bit of a fall out with family over it - some of them still haven't forgiven us for robbing them of a wedding but 2 years later we really don't care 🤷🏼‍♀️

We are quiet and pretty private people who dislike a fuss so it suited us .

We felt exactly the same, luckily our families weren't too annoyed or didn't tell us anyway. There was no proposal, just, 'shall we have a civil partnership now it's legal for opposite sex couples?' 'Yeah we probably should' no fuss, it was great
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WinterIsGone · 04/05/2021 21:20

We booked the registry office one morning, and went along with our two teenage DC, who acted as witnesses. The registrar let us do it in his office. It was all over very quickly. Perfect!

The registrar did point out to our DC that if anyone questioned the marriage, they might have to appear in court. They were happy with that. Grin

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Beachbabe1 · 05/05/2021 07:56

Thanks everyone. I am looking into an early bird weekday wedding.

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