Background info:
I am 6 months pregnant with our second child, we have been together 6 years, engaged 3 years and own our own house. Over the last few months, I have felt we have drifted and think this is mostly down to be pregnancy hormones and lockdown making us feel rubbish too.
I’m feeling a little bit worried and confused! Since lockdown started, HTB (husband to be) has always been to these “work meet ups”sometimes weekly to keep in touch with everyone, usually for a coffee and they have a separate group chat - he is the only male out of 3 people at these meet ups. It’s always been just him and a few girls which I have felt uncomfortable about but know it’s not something that should be an issue so just went along with it. They also have last night Zoom catch ups which I am never around as he does this in his office in our house.
There is one girl in his work (also in this group of 3) who he is really close friends with, Snapchat’s a lot and WhatsApp’s a lot but nothing has ever looked to me anymore than good friends. I’ve met her before, she came to our house to work once last year. She is engaged and has just bought a lovely house with her fiancé and we were invited to her wedding but it was postponed. HTB often tells me about how he thinks her fiancé can be not very nice to her so he always helps her with personal advice too... She is basically his best friend in work I would say. Lately, I became suspicious that he is only going for walks with her alone and not as a group. He is going for a “walk with work” today, however it seems to be just her alone. I know this as I saw a message pop up on his phone from just her (not in the group chat that they have) while they were deciding where to go with each other. So I imagine it is just my HTB and her going on the walk together. There was another time he went on a “socially distanced work walk” and it was only after it that I started to wonder if it was just those two rather than three of them. I’m sure last time it was only them two but I can’t be sure, however I can be sure this time! Am I silly to be feeling a bit shit about this, especially since she is engaged?
I haven’t brought it up as I always thought it was a few of them, it’s only today I am sure it’s just the two of them and I’m not sure how to bring it up to him. I’m also not sure if I will look controlling if I said it made me uncomfortable. I can’t stop him being close friends with a female colleague and wouldn’t want to but I’m worried it will end up more than that. I have anxiety as it is and sometimes fall into a depression so I am a very paranoid person and dont always know when I am being irrational.
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Relationships
Should I be worried?
FebruaryJuly · 17/02/2021 06:08
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