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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Why am I horrible?

9 replies

Magicpaint · 18/11/2020 19:55

I am going through a divorce. My husband didn't want us to split but I did.
I've upset a good friend of mine now I've lost her as a friend.
I'm inpatient, horrible, never happy and I honestly don't know how to get out of it

OP posts:
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Mintlegs · 18/11/2020 20:01

It’s good you recognise this. No one is perfect. Work on your self esteem kindness, respect. Possibly Counselling

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Thereluctantstepmother · 18/11/2020 20:14

I was like this when I was grieving for my my mum and traumatised by her illness. Of course I’m still grieving as it never stops but I’m not as horrible anymore. What helped me was psycho therapy. Good luck.

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Pyewhacket · 18/11/2020 20:30

I would say your husband has a result then.

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category12 · 18/11/2020 20:31

What's behind your anger and unhappiness?

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Liftup · 18/11/2020 20:33

when you're alone what are you thinking / feeling about yourself. are you worried, frustrated, bored with yourself or life, angry over past events ...what?

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widespreadpanic · 18/11/2020 23:58

I’m like this...I think it’s because my life is full of regrets and I’ve had nothing but bad luck most of my life. So I tend to take it out on those closest to me (usually a dp)

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Magicpaint · 19/11/2020 05:56

@Pyewhacket That's really helpful. I'm not the only horrible one by the looks of it only your spiteful as well.

OP posts:
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category12 · 19/11/2020 06:06

Do you think you could expand on why you think you're horrible?

Do you really think that, or is it what you're being told?

If you do think that, how long have you been behaving in ways you don't like? Is it new?

You must be divorcing for reasons. What are they?

With your friend, what went on?

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planningforlife · 19/11/2020 13:21

I find when I am horrid or difficult is when I am unhappy about something but struggling to find a solution.

Rather than thinking you are a horrible person have you thought about what makes unhappy?

If you could think about one or 2 things that you wished were different in your life what would you choose ?

Maybe start with those and see if you can make small changes or even just talk to Someone about it or write about it

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