Bear with me on this. I'm trying to keep a very long story short and include the important stuff without being identifiable.
I had a lifelong best friend. She suffers from mental health problems. She can't say no to anyone, ever, which allowed a horrible person to take advantage and bully her to a sickening extent.
The Bully very publicly humiliated my friend and I'd had enough, I stood up to the bully because my friend was in no fit state to, I told them to pack it in.
The Bully then turned on me and started a hate campaign to wreck my life. And they managed it fairly well.
Bully also convinced my friend to drop me, which she did quite quickly. It was a terrible shock.
This campaign to finish me seeped into many areas of my life, not just socially. It has affected family members and even my children. It has pushed me to the point of suicidal thoughts.
As much as I like to think Friend was somehow coerced, she seemingly did some nasty things of her own volition. Like she believed that I was the horrible person that Bully was suggesting. It made me face up to the fact that my former best friend was no longer anything of the sort and the stress of it all was just crushing. I was absolutely devastated, and still am. I feel like my whole personality has altered.
Anyway, this year I've really managed to pull myself up, mostly thanks to COVID meaning I didn't have to see any of the people involved (we live in a very compact area, part of the stress was being unable to hide)
I was doing ok.
Now I've received a message from my former best friend.
It's a very light, breezy hi how are you? type of message that you'd send to someone you'd simply lost touch with for a short while. She says that she misses seeing me around. No suggestion of any apology or admission of wrongdoing. No mention of any of it.
I know that Bully is not out of the picture, we move in close enough circles to be certain of that.
I feel sick at the thought of being drawn back into it all. My heart palpitations are back.
I've no idea what to do for the best. Should I respond or ignore.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
How, if at all, to respond.
lowerthanlow · 15/11/2020 22:45
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