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to really hate her after these comments?

13 replies

sarhasleep · 02/11/2020 10:04

I am going through interview processes atm after having completed a professional qual. The professional qual was pretty gruelling and I did have to retake some (which wasnt fun at the time and did make me doubt myself) but Im doing well in the interviews, and have already had a job offer after starting three weeks ago. Unfortunately the day job is super intense (think 15 hour days, 5-7 days a week) which has meant I have asked to reschedule a couple of the interviews due to very intense work commitments.

My sister, who I live with, commented yesterday that I have had to retake multiple exams and am always rescheduling interviews at my own convenience, the implication being that I am stupid, workshy, blah blah blah...

I really hate her. She is only happy when I am down and appears to resent any attempt to better myself. She is not stupid and actually had an oxbridge degree/is going through work interviews herself but (surprise surprise) wont discuss at all with me. She really relished me being made to feel upset.

Any tips on how to handle? Unfortunately we live together

OP posts:
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DiscombobulatedAf · 02/11/2020 10:17

Ignore her and don’t discuss work stuff with her anymore. You don’t need any negativity right now

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Bunnymumy · 02/11/2020 10:25

Move her out.
She sees you as the competition fyi. That's why she is happy when you 'lose' in life.
That isn't someone you want to have in close contact with you. She'll suck all the happiness away from you.

Youd do well to read up on npd as she may even be one of them jerks.

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Windmillwhirl · 02/11/2020 10:33

Well, she's not supportive is she? Something is behind it. Perhaps she liked being the successful one and she sees your success as encroaching on that.

I'd definitely recommend not living with her as a priority.

Don't invest your energy in hating her. She's not worth it and if could derail you and shift your focus from where it needs to be.

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Ohalrightthen · 02/11/2020 10:34

...move out?

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fabulousathome · 02/11/2020 10:36

Just don't tell her anything. She doesn't tell you so it's totally fair.

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SoulofanAggron · 02/11/2020 10:40

Have as little to do with her as possible, and move out ASAP. xx

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Aquamarine1029 · 02/11/2020 10:40

Stop giving her ammunition by telling her everything. You live your life and keep away from her. Aside from that, save your money and move out.

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sarhasleep · 02/11/2020 10:44

Thanks everyone, tbh I was always the successful one and I think she resented it. Now any opportunity she has, she uses minor things to rub it in my face. The prof qual was my first taste of things not going quite my way and she really relished it

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AgentJohnson · 02/11/2020 14:12

How does rescheduling equate to being stupid and work shy?

There’s obviously a backstory and she clearly rubs you the wrong way but it’s difficult to reconcile your feelings about what she said with what she actually said.

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9ofpentangles · 02/11/2020 14:15

Gotta love sibling rivalry!

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Bbub · 02/11/2020 17:15

Your professional qualification is just as good as anybody who got it without resits, it's the same thing at the end of the day, so please don't doubt yourself.

It's sounds like a really tough situation and she seems jealous and insecure to behave like that, if you hate her though you should definitely plan to move out. your home should be a safe haven not shared with someone you tolerate.

I hate my fucking sister too by the way and space is the only thing that helped me feel OK about things!

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TaintForTheLikesOfWe · 02/11/2020 21:58

I haven't spoken to my sister in eleven years. She makes my skin crawl. We have never got along. She is only happy if I'm struggling and she has done a lot of terrible things I can never forgive her for. My life is so much nicer without her in it.
Just because you are related to someone doesn't mean to have to take shit from them y'know.

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Mydogmylife · 02/11/2020 22:16

@sarhasleep

Thanks everyone, tbh I was always the successful one and I think she resented it. Now any opportunity she has, she uses minor things to rub it in my face. The prof qual was my first taste of things not going quite my way and she really relished it

Not excusing her AT ALL by the way, but were you by any chance the golden child in the family?
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