Family court. First hearing

[Pebbledashery]

Hi. Can anyone give me any guidance on what to expect at the first hearing for children's proceedings? Is interim contact agreed at the first hearing or is that at the FHDRA? Or is the first hearing the FHDRA? I am really confused.

[Time4change123]

Hi. You will agree some interim contact at the first hearing unless there are any safeguarding concerns. Have you done mediation? In my experience, the first hearing was my barrister and his sorting it out between themselves and we didnt even go into the court room. Then there should be a CAFCASS report ordered with the results of that going back to the court. Is there anything you can agree on between yourselves first? That is what the court ultimately want and sometimes it just takes the first hearing to make you realise that. Hope this helps.

[Time4change123]

Sorry, just to add. The first hearing sort ot sets the scene as to what you can't agree on and why. 2nd one is almost like a check-in to see how you are getting on, whether anything can be agreed. Final is ok you can't agree between you, so we will agree for you.

Are you being represented?

If i had my time again, i would represent myself. Not because the solicitors and barrister weren't good, but it costs alot of money and if you are a reasonable person who just wants what is in the best interests of the children, i think the court sees that.

[Pebbledashery]

Hello thanks for responding. Its going to be by phone. There's huge safeguarding concerns as he's been under investigation for child abuse by the police, we have to flee domestic violence and we've relocated to a new county and to a confidential address. He's assaulted and attacked me on many occasions including when I was pregnant and when I was holding our child. He's also been served a non molestation order. So I don't want to agree to any interim direct contact. My solicitor has advised maybe a supervised face time once a week...
How long between first and second hearing? X

[Pebbledashery]

There's been no contact for 5 months now between him and our child as when I fled social services ordered me to stop contact which I was going to do anyway but its been documented by the authorities.

[NightOwl19]

If there is a non molestation order in place, police reports and you've had to flea then at my first hearing which was similar, CAFCASS were ordered to do different reports and no physical contact was giving in that time but in direct contact was allowed so he was allowed to send a gift (which turned out to be inappropriate)

[UsernameTaken76]

Hi OP I hope you get the support needed I’ve reported your last post as you look to have included the name of your daughter & MNHQ will be able to remove that. Hope the court case goes well

[Mumdiva99]

@pebbledashery sorry no advice. But please ask mn to remove your comment with the name in.

[Pebbledashery]

Sorry yes I have reported it too soon as I posted. Sorry too early in the morning after being up there times with daughter! X thanks for reporting

[Time4change123]

Hi OP. In your case, unlikely to have any direct contact ordered while waiting for CAFCASS report. Fleeing abuse and non molestation orders make things very different. Court should also take into account the impact on you of any interaction with him relating to contact

Best advice i can give you is to keep as calm as you can and keep your head straight. It is scary and allvthe waiting for the various agencies to do their is frustrating because you will just want to know whats going to happen. But it will all work itself out. Take your time and do/say whatever you feel is in the best interests of your child xx

[Pebbledashery]

Thank you @time4change123 just feeling very scared. The courts will decide our daughters life.. A life free from abuse and happy and safe with me.. Or if he's given contact, its accepting his behaviour was perfectly OK and he's free to abuse her again. It is terrifying

[tickertyboo]

Pebbledashery - Family Rights Group may be able to give you some advice too regarding the court process and social services.

www.frg.org.uk/need-help-or-advice

[Pebbledashery]

Thank you, that's really helpful.
I know I have to expect he will at least get supervised contact in a contact center but the very thought of him seeing her again terrifies me as he was so horribly abusive to our daughter. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place, if I say I support contact I am 100% putting her at risk and as a mother I cannot do that, but if I say I don't support contact I look obstructive and unreasonable :( I wholeheartedly agree that contact puts our daughter at risk and he is not capable of changing.

[Pebbledashery]

@tickertyboo I phoned these people today. They were really helpful. Because we've had SS involvement she advised me really well. The lady I spoke to said the Courts will take it extremely seriously that we've had to flee to safety and that he can't find out where we live.

[tickertyboo]

Pebbledashery, that's really good news to hear. I'm glad they were able to help you. I wish you and your daughter all of the best for a peaceful future.

x