Husband and work colleague.. alarm bells ringing

Anonkatemummyof2 · 2020-10-23 01:14:16

Hi this is my first ever thread on here, it’s going to be a long one but I hope you can help me out a little bit or put my mind at ease, I’m driving myself crazy I just have a really bad feeling about my husbands work colleague, theirs quite a lot of things that have rang some alarm bells for me He’s started wearing much nicer things to work Regular hair cuts Buying new work clothes etc I found out about this work colleague from his Instagram which must I add is another odd thing for me because DH hardly ever use to use Instagram now it seems like he’s constantly using it and posting pictures. We was in bed the other night and I was scrolling through his Instagram when I saw the same girl pop up on nearly all of his pictures. I clicked on her profile and my heart instantly sunk for some reason, a beautiful girl, 23, amazing body, just the complete opposite from me. I found this quite strange my husband 48 was following a 23 year old girl so I asked him about her and he told me she was just a girl who worked in the office next door? I continued to question him as to how it got to the point of following each other on Instagram if she’s just a girl from the office next door. He said they have a communal kitchen and bumped into her quite a lot in their and they just started talking personally I still don’t know how that got to them following each other on Instagram DH is quite an unsociable man at work, he goes to work to work and doesn’t really interact with his peers that often so when he said he’s been talking to this girl in the kitchen that did surprise me. He said that she was half Slovakian and was teaching him a few words? sorry but that’s not like him at all. He was recently on a zoom call to some of his other work colleagues in the living room when I heard one of the guys say “Have you trimmed your beard for .... the girls name who’s been liking all his pictures on Instagram” I instantly look at him and his face turned bright red, I questioned him and he said it was just a bit of office banter I don’t know if he has some kind of crush on her and his work colleagues know but it’s very embarrassing and upsetting for me as now I feel like I’m constantly stalking this girl and comparing myself to her I realise none of this sounds much, but somewhere inside me, a little alarm bell is ringing. We’re a happy couple who rarely argue but things have become quite dull these last few months especially with corona virus. My husband works as quite a high manager in the nhs so as you can probably tell he’s been very busy during the corona virus waves. Our sex life has gone very down hill these last few weeks which is another alarm bell, I just feel so ugly and useless. I have two young daughters who love their daddy to pieces but even with them I feel like he’s bothering less with them, he snapped at my youngest daughter the other night over something so silly and made her cry, he apologised straight after but he’s never done anything like that before. It just feels like he’s constantly on his phone but I don’t know if that’s just me being paranoid.. also I’m not sure what a 23 year old is wanting with a married 48 year old man? Im so tempted to look on his phone. I’m sorry this is a long one guys but I just hope one of you could help me out

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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We've deleted this thread for the OP as it sounds like she may have been identified in real life.