Ok so I've posted about my messy situation before. Link here, its a long one.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/4000677-Left-for-another-woman.
I'll recap it here. Basically my partner of 10 years went out one night and didn't come home, turns out he had stayed with a younger woman he met at work. He left to move in with her 5 days later. Lots of other lies and mind games along the way. This was 2 months ago.
He then left her I'm not sure exactly when because he's told me different and been caught out lying several times, I've since found out she actually left him because it was too much drama with me and he'd already started trying to manipulate her and being mean to her.
Just over a week ago something happened with him which was quite traumatic anr he gravitated back towards me. Saying all the right things, he's been stupid, the universe keeps trying to tell him we're meant to be together, he wanted to take things slow and see where it goes. Me being completely in love with him and having absolutely no respect for myself slept with him, cooked him meals, let him stay here, bought him a birthday gift. I truly had this stupid idea in my head that we'd been brought back together for a reason. I know, I know. I sound like a teenager, I've always been a hopeless romantic and like I say I'm completely in love with him.
Everything was going well until Tuesday evening. He had been off work, so wasn't around her but went back on Monday. He started being distant again, taking forever to reply to messages, saying he was coming over then canceling, then sent a message saying he thinks that I think he's coming back to me and our flat again and he isn't yesterday after lots of conversations about taking things slow and being together again. I'm fairly certain he's seeing her again.
I messaged him last night just asking him to be honest because I was under the impression things were going better. He replied asking better for who though me or him and said sometimes he doesn't know what to say to me. I said i could see where it's going again and he said it's not really again though is it. I haven't replied or heard anything since.
I feel so stupid. I realize this all sounds so juvenile and as the title says I've only myself to blame. I knew all along I was only second best but pushed it to the back of my mind. He's completely used me and dropped me again and I feel so worthless. Why would I allow him to treat me this way? What is wrong with me.
Anyway I don't know why I'm posting this because I already know what the responses will be. I'm absolutely stupid.
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Relationships
Only myself to blame...
Lonelynow · 08/10/2020 11:36
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