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Relationships

When did you leave the word "divorced" and swap to "single"?

13 replies

discoveryspoon · 22/09/2020 16:29

Divorced 3 years ago and I find whenever there is a "drop down" menu on a website, I feel I have to put "divorced". I"m also "single" so which do I actually state?
I'd rather forget that I was ever married to be honest!

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NewYearHere20 · 22/09/2020 16:33

I changed to Single when I updated my Facebook Status about 6 months after I actually divorced. I "umm"ed and "aah"ed for AGES wondering how to negotiate the etiquette of changing status on FB. As it turns out friends didn't even notice the change as most of them already knew what had been going on anyway.

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Primrose64 · 22/09/2020 16:34

I'm remarried but I have been divorced. I only ever used "divorced" when I legally had to. I identified as single, I don't understand why it's an option in drop down boxes. You are either married, single, or I can understand using widowed when necessary. It should be dropped in my opinion. A divorce is something you went through, it's not a description of who you are.

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ArseNelbow · 22/09/2020 16:43

I always put "single" same as I put "Ms"; my status is my business Smile

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discoveryspoon · 22/09/2020 17:25

@Primrose64 - I totally agree. I find it very odd but agree with your last sentence.

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wedidntstartthefires · 22/09/2020 19:23

I've always used single the second I managed to get away from the dickhead ex, the actual divorce took years.

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gindinner · 22/09/2020 20:08

Never used it, always said single as soon as I could. Went back to using my maiden name as soon as we separated. Felt good

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TheDuchessofMalfy · 22/09/2020 21:16

That’s interesting. I’d never thought about it! I guess some people think single means you never were married, but I’m sure it’s not an actual definition.

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IronNeonClasp · 22/09/2020 22:45

@ArseNelbow

I always put "single" same as I put "Ms"; my status is my business Smile

WSS ^^
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allofthetings · 23/09/2020 21:03

I've used 'Ms' my whole life and didn't change my name when I married, I've never used divorced, just 'single' when needed.

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dudsville · 23/09/2020 22:08

Immediately. Divorce is a process, single is the outcome. It's as very outdated notion, the divorce' (I can't do the accent!!)

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jimmyjammy001 · 24/09/2020 00:11

I can understand for non dating websites there should just be single, but for dating websites should put divorced if you are, that's an important life stage that potential partners should know about

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fantasmasgoria1 · 24/09/2020 05:48

I put single as soon as I left him. I think once the relationship /marriage is over then its fine to put single. You don't have to be divorced to put single. Some people don't get divorced for some time and have serious relationships before divorce!

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LachlanRose · 24/09/2020 08:37

@jimmyjammy001

I think it's a personal disclosure type situation. Once your talking/dating. Why should I tell strangers my status? All they have to know at the initial stage is whether you are single and free to date/ pursue a relationship. If it's a deal-breaker for a person they can ask during initial conversation.

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