Talk

Advanced search

Lost respect for husband

(2 Posts)
Mommyto2angels Mon 14-Sep-20 02:18:02

I feel like I’m noticing lately how different I’m acting towards my husband it’s asif we are just Parents living in the same house not like a husband and wife everything he does annoys me when he kisses me I’m really never in the mood for it and I Just find him annoying most of the time.
I recently seen a post and am now thinking this could be the reason.
When we first met our relationship was perfect His mum and sister were very involved with him and I always thought they were very abrupt when they spoke To him about certain things but ignored it I remember one time we all went bowling his parents sister and niece and his niece kicked my son so he kicked her back and there was an awful atmosphere and a day later his dad rang him swearing and sticking up for the niece basically calling my son a brat and my husband seemed scared to answer back and I just couldn’t believe it.I had a miscarriage (well a couple) and I remember after we’d left the hospital his mom was on the phone instantly asking him personal questions about me and had we got to see the baby had we taken any pictures and I just blew and told him can you just tell her look we just want to be on our own none of these irrelevant questions but no he wouldn’t say a word. 2 years later we had our daughter And it got worse from there, we had her in November And my husband drives as a job so gets quite tired we were low on money but still went out to make sure all the family had a present from us it was late and on the way home he was so tired he pulled over and I drove the rest of the way, come Christmas Day he said to his parents did You open our presents and he just got a yea from his mum and I thought what no thank you And basically without saying it our present was shit and they’d expected more from us after he’d bust a gut at work and then gone out to get presents that evening I was fuming yet still he wouldn’t tell them so I did in the end and my mil just seems to think she is always in the right.
If my mil or sil want something like a lift or something picking up It is asked abruptly to him and if it’s a no from him they seem shocked asif To say he doesn’t have a life why can’t he. They have both offered to look after our daughter many times and then the day before say sorry I can’t now maybe another time so any plans go out the window and I think honestly what’s your problem it’s like they do things on purpose.
There have been so many other things happen and he still just ignores it or says he doesn’t want the aggro or to cause arguments.
It’s asif every few months my mil wants an argument we have fallen out so many times and he doesn’t stick up for us as a family properly and now I just find myself annoyed by him most of the time, I’ve got no sex drive or sexual feeling towards him at all really yet I do love him and I think do I feel this way because of the way his family are and the fact he seems scared to stick up to them????

OP’s posts: |
something2say Mon 14-Sep-20 09:03:44

Hello.

You could be right, it could be a reflection of your feelings, watching him be treated very badly and do nothing.

He is being abused by his family here. They treat him like shit. It's the family dynamic.

With you forcing him to face it and deal with it, there is a lot he could lose. He isn't yet ready to lose his family.

But of course he doesn't actually have them. You forcing him to face facts means he definitely loses his family.

I'd say, be his friend again. Listen to how he feels. Keep him safe a bit. Discuss it in detail. Reassure him he has YOUR family, you guys, your unit. That's his family now.

X

Join the discussion

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet

Already have a Mumsnet account? Log in