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Does anyone else do this?

(58 Posts)
Bekind2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:26:19

Hand over baby to hubby literally the minute he walks through the door from a 14 hour day? Recently went to a mums coffee morning and one of the mums is expecting her second dc and she said as with the first the minute hubby gets home she's going to hand over baby to him.. Just curious to know if any other mums did this..

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flametrees Sun 30-Aug-20 13:34:41

I did when my first had colic and I nearly went insane listening to her crying.

Aerial2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:35:43

I think this is pretty normal

TimeTruthandHearts Sun 30-Aug-20 13:38:32

Occasionally I'd let him take his coat off first, but not often.

Aerial2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:39:54

I don't know why a 14 hr day detail is relevant?
At home with a baby 14 hrs is pretty stressful.

Acdcccc Sun 30-Aug-20 13:42:00

It may be normal but don't think it's fair, i know I've been home with cranky baby all day but after a long work day i know dad / mom needs time to decompress before taking on a small one.

I'm not talking hours here but at least a chance for a quick shower and a brew.

Aerial2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:44:00

Most fathers gladly take the baby naturally?

TimeTruthandHearts Sun 30-Aug-20 13:44:12

My husband never minded, he looked forward to it.

Mumoftwo1994 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:46:06

Bekind2020

Hand over baby to hubby literally the minute he walks through the door from a 14 hour day? Recently went to a mums coffee morning and one of the mums is expecting her second dc and she said as with the first the minute hubby gets home she's going to hand over baby to him.. Just curious to know if any other mums did this..


It depends on how the day has been to be honest but there are times when you just need 5 minutes.

Bekind2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:46:09

Aerial yes I do understand that and agree to some extent but also I agree with Acdcccc.
My exP used to work 6 days a week 14/15 hour day manual job, came home as filthy as anything.. I gave him time to shower and just chill for half an hour before he took over.. Although I was doing a hard job myself, I still at the time felt for him that he was working that hard and long to provide for us.

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greyisagoodcolour Sun 30-Aug-20 13:47:11

Yeah, I did this. My first screamed and screamed day and night. I got about three hours sleep in a 24 hour period, in broken chunks. Why, are you judging?

greyisagoodcolour Sun 30-Aug-20 13:49:22

I still at the time felt for him that he was working that hard and long to provide for us

Ah, I see - you think the menz come first, and you want to encourage a slagging fest against any woman who disagrees, or acts differently.

Bekind2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:49:31

No not at all judging at all. I guess as one user mentioned it depends on what kind of day both mum and dad has.

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Aerial2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:49:40

Of course.
That's ok. It's also ok for a father to want to hold the baby naturally as soon as they get in.
Talking in mums groups, you will always hear how different families do things.

JamieLeeCurtains Sun 30-Aug-20 13:50:21

I've done '14 hour days' which involved 2 x 2 hours commuting (healthy walk, train journeys reading the Guardian / reading through lecture notes / eating half of packed lunch and drinking coffee), plus a one hour lunch break, and a fair amount of time chatting to colleagues & students and reading essays at a desk with my feet up. Meetings and lectures where I felt valued.

14 hours alone with a crying baby is hell. Especially when the escapee, usually one's DP, arrived back and asks what's for dinner.

Bekind2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:50:34

Grey.. Seriously back off. That's not what I'm doing. It was a question that was asked. I not engage in any kind of argument with you.

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Aerial2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:51:46

Also staying home with a baby is working hard for your family. They are the same, both parents working to raise the family..
Just saying as there is usually a big debate on mumsnet how a stay at home parent has it easier or something.

TimeTruthandHearts Sun 30-Aug-20 13:52:25

I guess as one user mentioned it depends on what kind of day both mum and dad has

Not really, my husband always wanted to hold them as soon as he got home. And I sometimes had lovely days on maternity leave, but was still ready to have some time to myself by the time he got home.

Bekind2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:53:03

I know. I think it's definitely a case of it depends on what day you've both had.. There were days where I did just want to hand her over straight away and up upstairs and cry or pass out

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ElanaD Sun 30-Aug-20 13:53:19

My hubby would go upstairs wash hands, change clothes and then come and take the baby off my hands after that. Normal.

Keeping2ChevronsApart Sun 30-Aug-20 13:53:25

Do babies cry for 14 hours solid ? I'd be straight down to a&e if any of mine had been like that?

Allthepinkunicorns Sun 30-Aug-20 13:53:46

I let dh have something to eat first and then I gave him ds while I went for a nap. I did all nights with ds during the week. It was a bit of bonding time for them both.

Bekind2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:53:50

But also days where I was so happy just holding her in my arms and looking at her!

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greyisagoodcolour Sun 30-Aug-20 13:54:21

If you don't want people to comment then don't post. What I am hearing is you criticising women who do things differently from you. I suspected it in your first post and if was confirmed in your ' let the poor dears' have a shower and cuppa first, that's what I do poor darling who works sooo hard for us'
There's literally no other reason I can think for you to post on such a non-issue.

Bekind2020 Sun 30-Aug-20 13:56:16

Grey.. If its such a non issue why are you putting more than your two pence in
You're a non entity and I won't regard anything you say any further. You don't even know me to say that. It was a question.

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