Too Enmeshed? | Mumsnet

TPlry · 2020-08-25 06:57:57

Ive been dating my middle aged bf for nearly a year now, he’s WAY too close to his widowed mom imo. Like when he wanted to vacation in Kazakhstan he mentioned his mom tagging along. He did it to his ex, too; they all went to LA together but he insisted his ex gf invited his mom to come along. Now he’s talking about marriage and how he wants his momma to live with us ideally...she’d stay in the guest room of a big house, that or she gets to live near us to take care of kids. In his eyes she’s a saint and he’d “risk everything” for her. In an argument he told me his mom would always win if I forced him to choose. Now he’s moved back home while his job has gone remote and looks after her despite his mom being healthy, able to move around...he says he really appreciates being back home after 22 years. She cooks for him, they spend most evenings together. Things haven’t been great between us but he says he doesn’t “know when” he’ll move out, seems like he’s content staying there indefinitely. I’m really worried because I DONT want any in-laws buzzing around me at all, you should “leave and cleave” to your spouse. This guy seems like he’s really involved in mommy’s life. Am I crazy, is his behavior normal or am I just overreacting. TL;DR: should i dump this guy for being too enmeshed with his mom?

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

This thread has been deleted

We've deleted this thread as the OP seemed to be sockying with herself so we're assuming the whole thing was made up.