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In a panic. Stbeh has bought a house without telling me.

(99 Posts)
dontrecycle Sun 16-Aug-20 13:41:09

Just found out he has bought a house. We have not yet agreed on a financial settlement.

I live in the family home at present. Two kids.

I don't know how but am I liable for this? Does the debt for this house now come into play in our financial settlement?

OP’s posts: |
georgeandthedragon Sun 16-Aug-20 13:47:40

Not a lawyer but I would think yes as it's still marital pot
If you are in family house assume he needed somewhere to live also?

dontrecycle Sun 16-Aug-20 13:56:02

Yes but we can't afford two houses.

OP’s posts: |
georgeandthedragon Sun 16-Aug-20 14:05:15

Do you know how he paid for it / how the bank lent him the money - especially these days he would have had to prove to them he could afford it.

Maybe someone lent him money or he had some more money you didn't know about ?

NotaCoolMum Sun 16-Aug-20 14:06:12

What a wanker

icedbun5 Sun 16-Aug-20 14:09:55

Actually bought it?

Do you know how he's done it?

edwinbear Sun 16-Aug-20 14:16:59

But where do you think he should live if you’re in the family home? confused

Feralkidsatthecampsite Sun 16-Aug-20 14:18:22

Congratulations op - you are part owner of another house. Presumably it goes into the marital pot?

Longdistance Sun 16-Aug-20 14:18:58

Has he taken money from the family home? Remortgaged it to get a deposit?

maddiemookins16mum Sun 16-Aug-20 14:19:00

Surely he has purchased a home to live in so his two kids can come over half the week?

Thelittleweasel Sun 16-Aug-20 14:19:38


Assuming you are getting a divorce [or will] all your assets and any agreed ownership goes on "Form E" less any liabilities. So the equity on his new house will be shown as "his".

It is a good idea - in my view - to start getting "facts" together. If you know the address you can [for a few ££] get a copy online of the land-registry documents. You will be able to establish the beneficial owner and any restrictions, the amount paid and any mortgage on the property. May be interesting!

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 Sun 16-Aug-20 14:20:32

Don't panic. Firstly, he's got to live somewhere hasn't he? Where was he living before he brought the house?

Maybe his parents have brought it for him.

He CAN afford it, obviously, otherwise he wouldn't have been able to have it.

timeisnotaline Sun 16-Aug-20 14:21:52

I guess it’s a debt in the family pool now? Do you think he’s assuming you will pay current house mortgage on your own and you had expected help? I know you’re panicking but we probably need more detail smile
Has he actually executed and settled on it? Or just made an offer and starting the lengthy settlement process? What did you think the housing plans for each of you were and how would they be funded?

icedbun5 Sun 16-Aug-20 14:22:15


Surely he has purchased a home to live in so his two kids can come over half the week?

Well yes, but you shouldn't buy a house until the finances are settled! Perhaps sell the house they all live in. The OP says that they can't afford two houses.

nasiisthebest Sun 16-Aug-20 14:25:14

So what was the plan if you can't afford two houses? I doubt that he was supposed to go live in a tent in the backyard. Did you discuss keeping the family home? Can you buy him out?

netflixismysidehustle Sun 16-Aug-20 14:26:04

You need to find out how he financed the purchase and who's name is on the paperwork.

Smellbellina Sun 16-Aug-20 14:28:37

You can download the land registry doc for £3.

Northernsoullover Sun 16-Aug-20 14:31:20

My partners ex bought a house before the financial settlement. It was a mistake on her part as she defence got less than she would have had she not. Her parents helped her. So it might not be a bad thing for you.

PegasusReturns Sun 16-Aug-20 14:31:25

If he bought it with a mortgage presumably the bank thought he could afford it...

Northernsoullover Sun 16-Aug-20 14:31:36

Definitely* stupid phone

Monday55 Sun 16-Aug-20 14:32:05

Maybe he earns more than you know or he had some savings he never disclosed all these years / inheritance maybe? are his family wealthy ?

IceCreamAndCandyfloss Sun 16-Aug-20 14:42:40


Yes but we can't afford two houses.

He has to live somewhere and you have obviously decided to stay put in what was his home.

Surely you pay for yours and he pays for his until the finances are sorted. Or were you expecting him to fund your mortgage as well?

bakedoff Sun 16-Aug-20 14:44:47

Speak to a solicitor and find out more details

Lifeisabeach09 Sun 16-Aug-20 15:01:13

I'm likely wrong but isn't that a good thing? He can't force you to sell your co-owned home on the pretext of not affording another?

You'll have to take over responsibility for the mortgage of the joint house and/or buy him out if possible?

Cheetahfajita Sun 16-Aug-20 15:05:34

Had you discussed where he would live?

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