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Problems with husband drinking

(6 Posts)
Sarapq2 Sat 15-Aug-20 19:31:53

Hi
Normally my husband is s wonderful man we talk and laugh , we don't have much money but we get buy.
2 weeks ago a complaint was made at work he seemed to brush it off but Wednesday night he asked me to take him to get more drink , I did I'm terrified of neighbour report any rights.
He got drunk and continued to for few days .the Friday he got fired for being drunk he knows he was stupid , but a good thing came from it.
He starts s new job tomorrow but is now opposite me asleep during to drink.
Please don't say leave him you can do better as that won't be happening .
I have a job but it doesn't start till next month.
We had sex today first time in ages but it was more like it was to diffuse the situation.
Part of me wants the drunk to go but I still want the person I fell in love with.

OP’s posts: |
pointythings Sat 15-Aug-20 19:58:49

If this has only been going on for 2 weeks and prior to that his alcohol use was normal, I'd sit down and have a calm conversation about how it isn't a good idea to use alcohol as a coping mechanism.

If this is something he has a habit of doing when life gets tough, you have bigger problems. You clearly know that life with someone with an alcohol problem isn't going to be good, but you've already decided leaving isn't an option. If that is the case, there isn't a lot of help to be had and I hope you don't have children.

Sarapq2 Sat 15-Aug-20 20:23:28

No , no children and it is an on going issue .
I'm a recovering alcoholic myself so I know issues.
I was just hoping for some wisdom

OP’s posts: |
pointythings Sat 15-Aug-20 20:36:09

If you're a recovering alcoholic and this has been ongoing, then you know there is no wisdom. There is no magic wand. You know he won't stop drinking until he is ready to admit he has a problem and has a desire to stop. You've done all this yourself. Please don't think that there is a quick fix - there isn't. And you can't rescue him, not even with all your knowledge. Only he can do that. Huge hug to you.

Justcallmebebes Sat 15-Aug-20 20:38:25

There is no wisdom or magic wand to wave to make this go away. Once someone is losing jobs etc due to alcohol then there is a problem. Unless your OH addresses this himself because he wants to change then there is nothing you can do. As you are a recovering alcoholic you must know all of this. You cannot save him, only he can save himself

NotaCoolMum Sat 15-Aug-20 20:49:46

“Part of me wants the drunk to go but I still want the person I fell in love with.”

Unless he wants to change you know that’s not going to happen. Have you told him you’re concerned?

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