Mum's coming up to look after ds tomorrow afternoon while I allegedly study. Fantastic. She offered to come up early and do housework. Had to put her off as dh working at home finds it intrusive. I know she will take one look at the house and mentally throw up (it is disgusting atm, though tidy). Woke at 2.30 am to put ds back in his bed and lay awake for 45 minutes having a mental row with mum about the state of the house. Got up at 3.15 to brush the carpet (can't hoover at this hour), clean the hob, sweep up and wipe the bathroom floor.
My house is so bad DH has signed up to FLY lady to get on top of it. I know I should feel guilty being a SAHM but with the 2 DC's I don't get a chance to do much, and when I do have a minute I'd rather be on MN too (pref with a nice cuppa)!
Speech and language therapy sounds interesting - are you planning a career change or is it work related? I completed a 4 year law degree part-time just before I had DS1, don't think I'd manage to anything like it now I have two of them around to distract me.
I carefully refrain from finishing every argument with "But it's costing you a fortune and giving you cancer! All you moan about is how you're tired and poor, you could solve both those in one fell swoop by REFRAINING FROM SETTING FIRE TO 5 POUNDS A DAY."
'I would rather you did not do any housework, I feel very upset/angry (any other emotion) when you suggest it, in future I would rather you do not mention it'
Non confrontational/non argumentative. Obviously change it into wording your comfortable with.
It is okay to tell her not to do it. Would you go to a mates house and tell her your going to tidy it? I think not! V rude to suggest it even! And just because she's your mother gives her no rights in YOUR home! Your home, your rules! And if you get rats, they make fantastic pets! And as a bonus will probably scare the mice away
Hide the secateurs
Smile noncommittally when she says my son is growing out of his Asperger's Syndrome
Smile noncommittally when ten minutes later she says she hadn't realised how bad he was getting...
Say, yes, isn't there? when she says there is always a bowlful of washing up in our house
Ditto when she says that young people nowadays never do ironing (mind, I'll forgive her that one for the 'young' part of it!)