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Awake and pondering

(3 Posts)
iamtheoneandonlyyy Mon 27-Jul-20 20:42:20

I'm recently separated from abusive man. Been to a refuge and hell and back but coming out of the other side.
I've got 3 beautiful young children and Ive just turned forty.
Now obviously I'm only focusing on them and not even considering any kind of relationship nonsense but I've just really looked at myself and I can see fat bits, starting to wrinkle bits, tired eyes, puffy face. And it got me thinking, am I ever likely to want a relationship again or even find anyone interested now that I'm in debt (not mine but I've been dragged into it), looking pretty terrible and come with three children.
The ex still looks 30, hasn't had any body changes after 3 kids and is living the high life of course and although this is the best thing I've ever done I'm feeling a bit...I don't know the word.
Don't get me wrong the children are my utmost priority and I'd do anything for them but am I just mum now forever lol. Not that I even mind that to be honest, I think maybe I'm just feeling a bit shit after everything.
This post seems pointless now but there's only a stuffed Minnie Mouse toy to talk to in here and she doesn't say much..ha.
Can't work out if I'm a huge mess or just gradually been made to feel this way

OP’s posts: |
BPSCSS Mon 27-Jul-20 23:48:36

You've been made to feel that way and when you first leave you do feel drained- understandably so. I went to hell and back after leaving an abusive man then randomly rediscovered my sex drive! I was left with facial injuries, the took ages to heal so that was a barrier to feeling attractive again. But now, I feel more attractive than I did with him, I am not fat (well a bit), my hair doesn't look like a homeless person as he said. You will feel better x

AnotherOldGeezer Tue 28-Jul-20 08:39:45

I’m a late 60s married straight guy

I hated the way I looked when I was younger. There are virtually no photos or videos of me with my family.

I now look back and think I was insane. We can’t all be 10s in our looks. And people are looking for people who match up with themselves

Accepting yourself is probably the most attractive feature anyone can have

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