There's no one else involved but for me the marriage is dead. I've tried but I don't find him attractive at all and I cringe with any physical contact. I haven't told him this because I can see how hurtful it will be.
Fundamentally he is a good man and I don't want to see him any harm which is why I have prolonged this agony for far too long now. We have 2 DC under 10 and whilst half the time he is a caring dad, the DC don't respect him at all. He will binge drink a couple of nights a week until he is a mess and has no authority with them at all.
I worry that if he moved out he couldn't accord rent on a place on his own. We're not big earners but we live a modest life. Our mortgage repayments are a lot lower than monthly rent on houses around here. I'm stating this presuming I will keep the house and have the kids with me.
He has also suffered with depression and has threatened to kill himself on more than one occasion. He's never gone through with anyone but it scared me enough to get him help and he is currently on antidepressants. I worry that if we split he will do something silly and I just couldn't live with myself.
It is also our 10 year wedding anniversary coming up. If I do bite the bullet and end the marriage is it better to do it before or after? I feel like I know what I want to do but I am terrified of the consequences either way.
Sorry for the rambling post but my head is a bit jumbled up right now.
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I want to end the marriage but worried about his finances and emotions
5 replies
Fudgeytastic · 16/07/2020 21:37
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