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8months possible autism? DH and DS1 autism as well.

(10 Posts)
Mamaily Thu 16-Jul-20 21:08:55

Helpp.. i am in panic mode right now.

So my DH and DS1 are both high functioning autism. I love them and adore them sooo much. Because of them having autism now i watching my ds2 like a hawk.

Ds2 is 8 months and very different from my ds1. But i still have this feeling that he is not NT. he is quite bad in his motor skill development. So my ds2 :

- He cant crawl yet.
- He can sitting down if i put him in the sitting position.
- He only able to managed roll over when he was 7m and up until now not too keen to be on his tummy.

- Its reallly hard to make him laugh.
- He doesnt like peek a boo at all.
- He can babble “ma ma ma” but rarely.
- Sometimes he respond to his name but not always.
- he cant clapping, pointing, waving
- he cant imitate me at all despite i tried billion times everyday

- very picky eater since the beginning. Doesnt like to be spoonfed. So we doing blw but still very picky.
- Cant bear his weight on his feet
- cant pull himself to stand up yet
- NO separation anxiety at all

I know with autism it will shows more when they are bigger. But everyday my heart is sinking even more. Because i already have dh and ds1 who got autism. And from what i heard they said son number 2 most likely more severe in the spectrum.

Please anyone is there any baby that similar to mu ds2 and is he or she NT or autism??

And is that true second born usually more severe in the spectrum?

Very much appreciated for the replies

OP’s posts: |
Minty50 Thu 16-Jul-20 21:28:03

Hi
Sorry you are worried. My autistic son is 15 now but I do remember the not being able to point or wave for a number of years. He was very active and used to mouth everything.Though he did teach his milestones until about the age of two then diagnosed at two and a half.
I’m not sure if there’s any evidence about a second born being more severe.
You could maybe ask the National autistic society about that.Hopefully you will get some more replies.

Fidgety31 Thu 16-Jul-20 21:40:55

Some of those things he’s too young to do anyway like crawling or standing .
My autistic sons weren’t unusual as babies per se - it’s more as they develop I think you will notice as babies can vary so much anyway
I would definitely give it more time

bitheby Thu 16-Jul-20 21:45:10

He's still so so tiny. Please try to enjoy your baby and not be so consumed by this as your anxiety will rub off on him too.

I'm autistic myself. It's not the end of the world! I bet he'll be walking eventually wink

Soconfusedandlost Thu 16-Jul-20 21:48:50

My main advice is monitor but don't panic. My brother and his son are autistic. I believe my father is too but has never looked into it. My DD displays some characteristics at 4 but not severe enough to cause me concern yet. My DS is 20 months and I have concerns. In terms of development, he didn't eat solids till 9 months, crawled at 17 months and walked this month. He refuses to be spoon-fed so we dont. He can say mama, no and yes and can sort of wave.

Don't put pressure on yourself and see where it leads. If you are wound up about things, your DS will too as well as DH and DS1.

My sister has helped me greatly but reminding me when I start to panic-spiral that "you can't cross the bridge till you get there and by then there may not be a bridge to cross"

Aria2015 Thu 16-Jul-20 21:58:00

Most of the things you mention my lo wasn't doing at that age. He started to wave and clap around a year old and he also developed separation anxiety at around 18 months (which lasted until he was 3+!). I know it must be hard and I can see why you're on the look out but try not to worry too much about it as he's still so young. They can change so much in such a short period of time, you may well find that by christmas he's doing most of things anyway.

GhostOfMe Thu 16-Jul-20 22:07:02

I don't think he's outside the realms of normal development with that. DS1 is NT, but has medical issues, Ds2 is autistic and Adhd. I know how hard it is, have been watching DS3 like a hawk. No one can tell at this age. Ds2 motor development was normal, his speech and social skills development were normal till 3.5. DS3 is developing normally, speech especially well ahead of his brothers, but has some of his brothers stims and mannerisms.

There is a genetic link, that means there is a higher % chance of your other children having autism if one does, but nothing about severity. I feel uncomfortable with that term though can't think of a different way to put it. So while your Ds2 is a little more likely than a child with NT siblings to be Autistic, he is not likely to be more affected if he is Autistic than his brother.

If you're worried about Ds2 development maybe worth speaking to your GP or HV. If you're struggling mentally it may be worth speaking to your gp or health visitor to get some MH support for you.

ittakes2 Sun 19-Jul-20 09:37:15

I am sorry this must be stressful for you. Worth also googling infant reflexes not going dormant as this can present itself as autistic traits plus it also can run in families. The specialists thought my son was autistic but after helping him to get most of his infant reflexes dormant they said he no longer has autistic traits. He did not have any eye contact until 4.5 years old but now at 13 has perfectly normal eye contact and has just in the last year started to point.

Tryingtobehappytomorrow123 Sun 19-Jul-20 09:51:44

Hi - my youngest son is severely autistic with severe learning difficulties but yet he did meet some early milestones, yet my first son who is “typical” was a constant worry - speech/toileting/fussy eater you name it we worried. I suppose the point in trying to make is that at a very early stage all babies will be different. I feel for you I really do but if you are stressed you may overreact too so it’s best if you can try albeit difficult to be patient and see how it goes

Aussiebean Sun 19-Jul-20 09:59:18

I think 8 months is too early. My group of friends had babies at a similar time and while my son was crawling around early, my friends dd was just sitting up but happily clapping away while my son had no idea.

My son walked at 11 months, dd 12, but my niece at 17 months. No issues there.

We basically said all the babies developed different but all developed normal.

I understand that this is something you want to get on early, but I think 8 months is too early.

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