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Err is it normal for your lidido to rocket after leaving a horrendous relationship?

(17 Posts)
BPSCSS Sat 04-Jul-20 16:10:12

So exH was abusive, marriage ended violently. I have civil injunctions in place and he recently pleaded guilty to assault. All I feel most of the time is relief and a huge desire for casual sex. Not something I can really ask anyone, but is that normal?

OP’s posts: |
dazzlinghaze Sat 04-Jul-20 16:12:19

My relationship wasn't as bad as yours but it was very unhappy and I felt the same when it ended! I put it down to suddenly realising I had possibilities again.

hamstersarse Sat 04-Jul-20 16:13:11

Completely normal.

BPSCSS Sat 04-Jul-20 16:16:22

Phew!

OP’s posts: |
DaisyRaisin Sat 04-Jul-20 16:33:41

I don't know any psychology behind it but I'd say it sounds like a normal reaction. Even a healthy one. It would give you an opportunity to meet you own needs for once, feel free to experience new things, claim back ownership of "you". Just take care of yourself through it all.

I am so happy you are out of that awful relationship and that is wonderful but take care of yourself. You are likely to be vulnerable in ways you haven't even realised yet. I hope that's not overstepping.

BPSCSS Sat 04-Jul-20 16:41:09

No it's not overstepping, I am staying well away from relationships casual or otherwise as I am still vulnerable.

OP’s posts: |
Busybee2912 Sat 04-Jul-20 16:46:18

Yes!

Have fun wink

GroovyGrove Sat 04-Jul-20 16:53:40

I was the same, but didn't acted because I didn't want more drama from another.

But yes! I was a beast 🤦🏽‍♀️

ThePathToHealing Sat 04-Jul-20 18:40:32

It happened to me too, I met my current partner three months after I left my ex and we would have sex 4 times a day at my instigation blush, we've been together 9 years now so things worked out well in the end!

TigerDater Sat 04-Jul-20 18:45:52

Yup

SoulofanAggron Sat 04-Jul-20 19:19:15

I imagine it is sometimes- it could be that your ex had put you off sex and without him you feel like your old self again.

It could also be a bit of a 'high' now some of the stress is over.

BertieBotts Sat 04-Jul-20 19:20:53

Normal. But good instinct not to indulge! Get some good sex toys grin

BPSCSS Sat 04-Jul-20 19:56:42

Lots of good advice, especially about sex toys!

OP’s posts: |
EvenMoreFuriousVexation Sat 04-Jul-20 20:06:59

I burned out the motors on two vibrators in the 4 months after leaving!!

burdog Sat 04-Jul-20 20:42:27

Maybe it's the libido you've had all along?

VistaOfFreedom Sun 05-Jul-20 17:08:26

I found the same, so it's very interesting to hear its a thing! grin

Greenforestt Sun 05-Jul-20 23:35:41

I'm going through the same thing too after having left an abusive marriage a few months ago. It's almost a year since the last time I had sex too. I wasn't sure how 'normal' my feelings were either.

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