Advanced search

Absent father to be

(11 Posts)
Amarah56 Tue 30-Jun-20 16:06:57

I am 33 weeks pregnant,my partner left to be in a new relationship when I was 16 weeks pregnant. I have not seen him since as he has moved away with his girlfriend. He does not contact me or ask about the baby. His family says he is happy and he will not be in my baby’s life. He is still paying half the mortgage on our house but wants me to sell up or buy him out. He will not be there when I register the baby’s birth as he will be busy. What can I do to get him to pay for baby’s upkeep?

OP’s posts: |
Bunnymumy Tue 30-Jun-20 16:20:02

Get that house sold asap.

He doesn't really get a say in upkeep, he has to pay child maintenance and that's that. If you let the relevant ppl know that is.

However I would think long and hard about putting him on the birth certificate as he sounds like a right dick.

Amarah56 Tue 30-Jun-20 16:42:58

Don’t I need him on the birth certificate for child maintenance?

OP’s posts: |
needsahouseboy Tue 30-Jun-20 16:44:09

No I don’t think you do. He has to be there I believe when you register the birth to be on it.

hellsbellsmelons Tue 30-Jun-20 17:04:23

You can leave him off of the BC and can still claim maintenance.
Contact CMS to get the ball rolling.

Amarah56 Tue 30-Jun-20 17:30:27

Thank you

OP’s posts: |
FizzyGreenWater Tue 30-Jun-20 17:39:54

Nope, you register a claim with CMS and if he disputes it, they'll ask him to take a paternity test to prove he's not the dad. So that's obviously not going to work out so well for him grin

He doesn't need to be on the BC, he doesn't need to have same surname as the baby. Don't put him on, give the baby your surname, sell the house asap and put in a claim to CMS from day one.

DisobedientHamster Tue 30-Jun-20 17:42:58

Do not give the baby his surname! You can't put him on the birth certificate without his consent as you are unmarried so no problems there. Sell the house. Put in a claim for maintenance.

FizzyGreenWater Tue 30-Jun-20 17:49:06

By the way - he may think that avoiding registering the baby gets him out of paying maintenance. It doesn't.

But don't make a point of telling him that, or you might find that if he knows he has no choice, he'll start weighing in and demanding his surname or choice of names - might as well if it isn't even going to get him out of paying. So, don't tell him when you register the baby, just in case.

LemonTT Tue 30-Jun-20 17:53:15

It might be worth seeing a solicitor about rights to remain in the house. Although you are not married, he still has a responsibility to ensure his child has a home. You could get an order that allows you to remain in the home for a period until you can return to work and afford a place of your own.

Mornington30 Tue 30-Jun-20 19:27:10

I agree, see a solicitor.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »