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Sick of DH doing this

(103 Posts)
RedAndYellowTulips Sun 28-Jun-20 17:21:23

About 6 months ago, DH, who has always done 'jokes' that only he thinks are funny, started to have a comical (in his opinion) obsession with my breasts.

Each time he walked up to me he'd keep grabbing my boobs, and it escalated to him grabbing them constantly and shouting 'boobies' in the way that the Cookie Monster says 'cookies'. I know this sounds ridiculous but it's the best way to describe it. He also does other stuff involving my breasts too, which I'm not going to describe as it's a total cliche thing that men do but he keeps doing it and I hate it.

If I wear anything that is remotely revealing he keeps saying 'boobies'. The other day I put on a bikini and sat in the garden and he came and sat in the garden too and kept saying 'boobies' and trying to grab them. In the end I went in and got changed as I just couldn't take it anymore.

It's starting to make me feel really dirty. I have in the past been sexually abused by a boyfriend in my early teens and it's making me feel so dirty because of that, I think. I've told DH time and time again that I hate it and not to do it but he says it's just a joke and that I've got no sense of humour.

I'm only a 32C BTW, not that it would make a difference to it being wrong if I had massive boobs but it's not like they're huge and in his fucking face all the time.

OP’s posts: |
GrannyBags Sun 28-Jun-20 17:24:09

He is grabbing you, even though you have told him to stop? That’s abusive. Tell him you will leave if he doesn’t stop - this is not a joking matter.

dementedpixie Sun 28-Jun-20 17:24:33

maybe you should find something he dislikes and then do it all the time to see how he likes that treatment. Sounds very wearing

Tanfastic Sun 28-Jun-20 17:25:24

Is he 14? confused

PenelopePitstop49 Sun 28-Jun-20 17:26:01

I'd suggest grabbing his balls really hard, squeezing and shouting "ballies" every time he walks past you.

devildeepbluesea Sun 28-Jun-20 17:26:56

Christ what a turn off. He'd be getting none if he were with me. He can wank into a sock like other 13 year olds.

RedAndYellowTulips Sun 28-Jun-20 17:27:24

It's hard to do things back to him and he's a foot taller than me and more than double my weight.

OP’s posts: |
Itsjustabitofbanter Sun 28-Jun-20 17:27:33

I’d punch him in the dick every time he grabs you

Cp1618 Sun 28-Jun-20 17:28:38

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RandomMess Sun 28-Jun-20 17:28:40

He knows it upsets you and he is carrying on with it... what a power trip for him!

TBH it's relationship ending behaviour.

KickAssAngel Sun 28-Jun-20 17:29:15

Yep, he's totally in the wrong. How much is this bothering you? Enough to leave, or tell him to move it for a while? He will only listen to you if he chooses to, he sounds like he'll ignore you no matter how clear and eloquent you are. If there's a way to get his attention, do it, but it sounds like you've tried. But you're absolutely in the right over this, with him firmly in the wrong.

Destroyedpeople Sun 28-Jun-20 17:30:15

I really couldn't tolerate that. Grab his cocktail and shout 'willy!' A few times? Or leave.

dementedpixie Sun 28-Jun-20 17:30:56

Buy a whistle and every time he does it blow it really loudly at him? Pepper spray? (Maybe joking with that one)

Destroyedpeople Sun 28-Jun-20 17:31:00

Cock not cocktail lol

dementedpixie Sun 28-Jun-20 17:32:14

I hope you're joking @Cp1618, he's acting like a prick not a loving husband

picklemewalnuts Sun 28-Jun-20 17:33:07

"I have in the past been sexually abused by a boyfriend"

And you are now. I'm sorry, but he's been asked and told and he's still ignoring you.

If you want to give it one more go, ask him how he'd feel if a man mountain, someone 18" taller and twice as wide, kept pinching his bum repeatedly even though he'd said no.

If he still doesn't get it, he's an arse and needs to go.

PickAChew Sun 28-Jun-20 17:33:25

Are you scared of his reaction if you told him, deadpan, to take his hands off you and grow the fuck up?

YgritteSnow Sun 28-Jun-20 17:35:05

I'd say coldly "what the fuck do you think you're doing? Get your hands of me." Every single time he did it.

tiktok Sun 28-Jun-20 17:35:24

Cp1618 has to be ‘joking’ - idiot.

OP - it’s abusive unacceptable behaviour. You do not need to tolerate it.

RedAndYellowTulips Sun 28-Jun-20 17:35:36

He's said I've got an attitude problem in the past when I've not gone along with his jokes. He had one for ages saying I smelt down below, again when I didn't like his joke I had an attitude problem.

OP’s posts: |
Destroyedpeople Sun 28-Jun-20 17:35:42

Hm the thing is if you have asked him to stop repeatedly and told him that you really don't like it....and he just continues...it IS sexual abuse. Certainly not the behaviour of a loving husband.

TooTiredTodayOk Sun 28-Jun-20 17:35:52

I've told DH time and time again that I hate it and not to do it

Your husband is showing and telling you quite clearly that he doesn't give a fuck how you feel about it, he will continue to sexually assualt you whenever he wants to.

Destroyedpeople Sun 28-Jun-20 17:36:49

Oh OP that is so horrible....flowers it's so not right.

whenitalkaboutsexnobodylistens Sun 28-Jun-20 17:37:31

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

dementedpixie Sun 28-Jun-20 17:38:19

@whenitalkaboutsexnobodylistens, you're an idiot too then

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