I have been trying to leave for 5 years

[Orange2016]

We have a 3 year old DC.

Every time I try and end things he withholds money and contact from DC. Which leaves me unable to work. I have no friends or family who can step in. I am constantly on edge.

I was holding out on things getting easier when DC grows older but I don’t want to feel trapped and low all the time and wish years of my life away

Even in the periods of time I’ve stuck to my guns and ended things, there isn’t a light at the end of the tunnel that I’ve escaped. There’s just financial worries and loneliness, spending days and weeks on end with no adult company while he is out socialising, working and enjoying life.

I’m so tired of waiting for this to get better.

[Finfintytint]

Women’s Aid can assist. They will give you options.

[MrsGRamsay]

Hello. I'm bumping so you know you're not alone and if other people can help.

Is it safe to disclose where you are? X

[Orange2016]

I know I can force him to leave if I really push it but the outcome is so much worse than this. Even with his contributions at the moment financially, things are so tight.

And I just don’t have the capacity to be a single parent and take on everything he currently does with DC. I really don’t. Maybe if I had a support network, but I don’t have that. At least now I can work and have time to myself, if he disappeared id lose that. The longest he has stayed away is a few months after I ended things, and it was the darkest few months of my life. The only real option seems for me to suffer through dealing with him for the next 10+ years when DC is older.

I live in London