Hello,
19 years ago, when I was 17, I had a boyfriend for a short period of time, I'm talking only 2 months or so. 2 months because my parents made me dump him because they didn't want me to have sex - I was their little girl, they wanted me to stay a virgin, not get pregnant and go to university. They made me dump him by text message. And you know what, until this day it has completely haunted me, broken my heart and I really, really can not get over it. I have had boyfriends since, i have a lot of male friends but I just simply cannot fall in love.
The boyfriend I had has not spoken to me pretty much since, but for 7 or 8 years afterwards when i saw him at the gym or on nights out, he used to stop and stare at me, he called my mums home number at 2am one night, probably drunk, but he left a voicemail telling me that he fancied me and wanted to get together but he could never tell me to my face... maybe fear of getting hurt, I really don't know. I have been away for 9 years and have been busy living my life, but now I'm back in my home town I can't stop thinking about it, even though I want to!
He is happily married now, and has 2 children. But I really need to get this off my chest so that I, personally, can get on with my life and not feel like I disrespected him by dumping him via text message and that I genuinely did nothing wrong - secretly we liked each other fof years but in this world most ex's don't speak do they (silly really) - seriously, its eating away at me day in day out. I have been told to message him, explaining what happened but also I shall congratulate him on his family and wish him well, I'm a very kind person with a big heart and I get a lot of compliments for my personality. Do you guys think this is the right thing to do? I'm not expecting him to reply, but as long as he knows what happened, it'll make me feel better.
Another point, is that I was also friends with one of his friends for years, or let's say someone he knows, and this person liked me but I didn't want to do anything with this person because I didn't want to disrespect my ex. You don't go with your ex's friends. This person I think told my ex that he went with me, because I think he was jealous that I liked my ex and not him. This is totally not ok.
What do I do?! And what words do I use? I just want to get on with my life without it bothering me. I'm not a home wrecker, I don't want to take him away from his family. I just want it known, it's making me feel so down, I cried at work yesterday!
Thanks
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I need some words...
18 replies
Luby34 · 21/06/2020 08:11
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