I just realised yesterday that there is a "thing" to describe my husband. He's often emotionally unavailable... which is fine day to day, but I am going through a really stressful, emotional time right now...
Two weeks ago I discovered that my dad's cancer had spread and he needs treatment. But he felt confused and overwhelmed on the phone with the consultant (possible early stages dementia - the GP will not refer for tests until "Covid is is all over") so he asked them to post the info out and ended the call. I got my siblings involved and we've grouped together to arrange support and move things forward. As you can imagine there's been a lot of phone calls, video calls, messages etc exchanged over the last couple of weeks. Yesterday he has his pre op and we're waiting for a date for major surgery. It's been hard.
At the beginning of this two week period, my husband shrugged his shoulders and said "you've just got to try not to worry about it". A few days in, he said something that upset me and I've only had minimal discussions with him since.
Not once in all that time has he asked how my dad is doing, how the rest of my family is doing, how I am doing. He's on a family what's app group which my dad messaged to say about his operation, but my husband hasn't even acknowledge that. He has been grumpy and argumentative, shouting at me and the kids and fighting with me about unrelated things. I asked him today if something was bothering him or if I had done something wrong - one word "no" answers to both.
I just don't know where to go with this - I don't understand why he's being so unsupportive and uncaring, why he has such a lack of empathy and awareness...
Any advice or experience?
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Relationships
Coping with an emotionally unavailable partner when you need support
Quarantined · 19/06/2020 13:19
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