Where to begin.After knowing each other for 8 years, my partner persuaded me to live with him so that we could sort and decorate this house, then search for a joint house and thus have a 'rest of our lives' fabulous time together.
Well, it isn't. He's lazy. will only clean up when suggested to. Only bathes approx twice a week. Won't cook. Makes no effort to go out except to do what suits him, spending most of the time in the corner of the room on his screen telling me he expects me to be silent and not disturb him. etc.
I feel I have been lied to.
I'm now in the spare room as the bedroom stinks so much due to his lack of hygiene.
He tells me he has anxiety, so I've worked with that. Tried to boost his self esteem/confidence, bit my tongue when things don't get done as if I do say anything he closes his eyes, does big sighs, then goes to bed, making me feel bad.
Yesterday - and not for the first time - he blew up at me, no sign of anxiety , yelled, swore and stormed off to bed. He's still there. He did get up this morning, but for once I was really cross and told him in no uncertain terms that after 4 years of this, I've had enough, that he needs to see a doc if his anxiety is that bad. He then closed his eyes, sighed and went back to bed, and is still there.
Is this really how anxiety manifests itself? I knew him for 8 years previous to moving in and had no sign of it apart from him cancelling a couple of weekends as he needed 'some quiet time', which I though nothing of.
So, I have learned to know my place. I have been silenced...........he thinks!
I've decided to leave and move somewhere I've always wanted to live. I've spent the day searching for jobs and places to rent. I've found a place where, in my head, I'm living already..................
............and I feel so bloody sad. What a waste.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
I have been silenced.......................
ConcentricCircles · 14/06/2020 19:33
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.