As the title suggests...
I am almost 37. I have been married for 5 years to my husband who is 20 years older than me. We have a 3 1/2 year old DC who will start school next year. We own our property outright, in both names. We both work full time.
I’m not happy in my marriage, never have been fully happy, and to be honest I married for the wrong reasons. I have been with my husband for 8 years. Prior to us getting together, the man I truly loved chucked me. I then met my husband, had a fairly good relationship with him but not amazing, got to 30 and believed this was as good as it gets. He didn’t even really propose to me properly.
We had a fairly good relationship until we got married. Our wedding day was beyond awful. He is not perfect but overall has more good points than bad. A lot of stressful life events happened then our dc was born. Unfortunately he had some health problems soon after marriage that means we have been unable to have sex for years. He may be able to fix this with surgery, which is being looked into.
I no longer find him attractive. We get on well but don’t have anything much in common. He’s a very good father though and is kind and caring in general.
There is resentment on my part from the things in the past, his lying about his previous marriage and why it ended (No, I wasn’t OW!) the fact he doesn’t keep in touch much with dc from previous marriage, has had trouble holding down a job, and some financial lying. He knows how I feel about all this.
Now we tick along. He’s not happy either I’m sure. Now that dc is past the hectic baby stage I suppose this has come to the fore.
So here it is. Am I deluded in thinking I could do better, with someone nearer my own age who I am passionately in love with, that loves me too despite my saggy boobs and being a single mother? Should I leave a nice non abusive husband and put my daughter through a divorce? Am I being a princess? Am I having a mid life crisis? Is it my hormones, peri menopause etc? I’m ok about being on my own, but would be looking for another relationship in the long run.
I grew up with parents who are still married but have been deeply unhappy for as long as I remember. I do not want my daughter to go through what I did.
Am I being ridiculous? Tell it to me straight please.
Thanks.
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Divorce or mid life crisis?
10 replies
MidLifeCrisisMandy · 02/06/2020 16:26
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