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Saw my boyfriend after 8 weeks apart and I feel really 'off'

(6 Posts)
jinniefromtheblock Sat 30-May-20 19:20:38

My emotions are all over the place and at the same time non-existent and I don't know why.

I thought when I finally met up with my boyfriend (even being 2m apart) I'd feel so much love and I'd be overwhelmed with happiness, but instead I just felt really numb and confused.

We met up in a local park and it was just a weird situation . We were both sat 2m apart and we just talked about the local news etc. We'd already been facetiming each other regularly so we didn't really need to catch up. I felt so much distance (not just physical distance but emotional). Yet he was all smiley and telling me how happy he was to see me and he just wishes he could touch me etc.

We've been together 18 months and this is the first time I've been away from him for longer than a couple of weeks. I feel like so much time has passed and it's almost weird to think about things going back to normal again.

Like, I've been missing him so much but when I saw him the other day it was like it wasn't even him. Maybe it's just because he looks so different (his hair is longer and he's put on a bit of weight, which is expected during these times), but why am I feeling so down? Is this normal?

OP’s posts: |
Medstudent12 Sat 30-May-20 19:25:50

Normal! Will definitely ease when you’ve got used to being around each other more.

Trevsadick Sat 30-May-20 19:34:00

I think its normal. Long separations can change relationships.

When reunited, some relationships make it and return to normal. Some don't. Another depends on how you were before and whats been going on for both of you during the separation.

I know I have changed during lockdown, actually for the better for me. Lots of people do.

I am sorry it was the reunion you expected. flowers

ThePathToHealing Sat 30-May-20 20:24:13

I'd have this with my boyfriend when he went away. It would take a few days for me to connect with him again and then it'd be like he'd never left but I remember how unsettling that feeling is when you start questioning whether you ever had a connection or what happened to make it disappear. It will just take a bit of time. Hopefully you'll get to be with eachother a little more soon and things will start clicking again.

peonypower Sat 30-May-20 21:02:21

I am a military wife and used to long separations. It takes a good week to get back to normal each time.

lilkim Sat 30-May-20 21:26:04

I think this is absolutely normal and nothing to worry about, but I can understand why you'd be worried.
Nothing is normal at the moment, it's such a strange unknown world right now so don't put pressure on yourself or assume your emotions and feelings are rational or well adjusted at the moment.
I would say once the lock down is eased and you can go on dates, be intimate etc the love will come back, it's never gone.

In the real world, in a pandemic, out of a pandemic couples have to work at their relationship.
It's not simple or sometimes that easy.
I love my fiancé so much but I reackon if we were dating and this happened to us I'd feel the same and be confused.
Just try your best not to think about it too much and look forward to the day you can have fun with him again x

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