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I've been cheated on.

(49 Posts)
whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 05:26:00

I found out this weekend my boyfriend cheated on me. He invited a few 'friends' round whilst i was in bed and kissed another girl.

I'm gutted. I got a half hearted apology on Saturday and have not heard a word from him since. I feel so urgh.

How can I get over this?

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FirstTimer861 Thu 14-May-20 05:39:50

Really sorry to hear this.
Lowest of the low.
How long have you been together? Any children? And how did you find out?

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 05:41:07

We were together for 18 months. No children. I just want to feel better.

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whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 05:41:43

I found out through a friend. He didn't tell me.

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guanciale Thu 14-May-20 05:43:49

do you live together? kick him out

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 05:45:11

No we don't live together. I just feel so sad all the time. The lack of contact had been worse than the act itself. How can he just cut me off so easily?

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copperoliver Thu 14-May-20 05:49:49

Stay away from him he's obviously disrespectful and not worth you wasting your time on. Block him.
Once this is over find yourself someone nice who treats you how you deserve to be treated x

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 05:54:17

Thank you @copperoliver - there is no need to black him, I've not heard from him 😒. I feel so flat. I just want to feel better.

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FirstTimer861 Thu 14-May-20 05:59:34

Has he ever done anything like this before?
This is where you have to set your boundaries! If you don't, and it will hurt like hell for a while, then this will just become a pattern.

He clearly doesn't care and he no remorse if he hasn't tried to contact you!

Do you have family and friends around you that you can lean on for support?

MrsRudderless Thu 14-May-20 06:10:19

You will feel better. Just not yet.

You've been let down.

But, on the bright side, you don't have to ever
allow him to do it again by never seeing/speaking/texting him again.

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 06:10:37

@FirstTimer861 - I don't know if he has done it before. I have a lot of support. I just feel so sick all the time. I'm meant to be working from home and I'm finding it impossible to concentrate. I feel so tired all the time.

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WhatInFreshHell Thu 14-May-20 06:11:27

Sorry that you're going through this, you deserve better! Block, NC and move forward.

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 06:12:24

@MrsRudderless - thank you. I hate feeling like this. He had really let me down. So so badly.

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whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 06:13:23

@WhatInFreshHell - thank you. I've not contacted him. I have nearly so many times. Even typed out the message. But I've not sent it.

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Longtalljosie Thu 14-May-20 06:14:33

Don’t go back. If you do, you’re telling him you’re fine with a lack of loyalty, that he can do what he likes and you’ll put up with it. Find your anger. Delete and block his number, grieve for a bit then get to the stage where you see him for what he is...

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 06:16:23

@Longtalljosie - he doesn't even want me back. I've not heard anything. I want to find my anger because it's got to be better than this constant on the 'verge of tears' feeling.

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MsF1t Thu 14-May-20 06:19:30

What people have already said- plus, am I right in thinking this has happened since lockdown? Because if he had a party during lockdown he is an utter twunt and not worth bothering with for that reason alone.

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 06:22:31

@MsF1t - yeah. I know. I was staying with him but have come back to my place (only me and DC here).

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whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 06:23:58

I have a 10 year old DD.

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copperoliver Thu 14-May-20 06:26:43

You will feel better in time, it will just take a bit and soon you will feel okay again, x

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 06:27:17

@copperoliver - I hope so. I really do. I'm so tired.

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Bluesheep8 Thu 14-May-20 06:54:05

Hang on, he's invited friends round and you're back and forth between his house and yours with your child? hmm

Bluesheep8 Thu 14-May-20 06:56:16

Sorry just read that you left his house (presumably due to this episode) but he still shouldn't have had friends round should he?

Elephantonascooter Thu 14-May-20 06:58:47

I'm sorry op. That's shit. But you will feel better, not yet, but you will. Everything happens for a reason.
Just a gentle reminder to get an STD test soon flowers

whatagonnahappennow Thu 14-May-20 07:15:58

@Elephantonascooter thank you. I wish I could feel better now.

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