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Relationships

Meeting someone at 48

181 replies

Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 20:30

Is it too late?

I don't think so but perhaps others think otherwise?

Am due to start a new job soon with plenty of potential to meet someone - moving to new area.

I still want a nice home and good lifestyle but at this age, broke and starting at the bottom again, today I am starting to wonder if its a dream rather than a realistic goal.

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BitOfFun · 08/05/2020 20:37

Of course it's not too late! And good luck with the new job.

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Brakebackcyclebot · 08/05/2020 20:39

Never too late! My husband was 54 when I met him. Should he have written himself off?

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ilovemydogandmrobama2 · 08/05/2020 20:46

Absolutely not!

My mom met her husband in her 50s, and she said that one of the really lovely things about starting a relationship at that stage of your life is being more relaxed. You know who you are, what you want and also an acceptance of other's previous relationships, if that makes sense?

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Jellykat · 08/05/2020 20:49

I bloody well hope not, or theres no hope for me, i'm newly single and 56!

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 20:55

Thank you all - That' s really encouraging!!!!!

I have just looked on Guardian soulmates and it looks as though a lot of men have joined during lockdown! I'm too scared to put a picture up but do browse every so often.

Sometimes it feels a though there isn't enough time left to climb all the mountains to get to where I want to be. I have finally accepted that its too late for children but there are other things I want and it does seem as though all my peers have the building block sin place with jobs, house, partner and children. Having none of those is liberating in its own way (and I know I am rose tinting it here) but at the same time it would be nice to feel I had a nice home instead of renting and my life was moving forward !. My job is entry level in a very staid environment after years of being freelance but I think it will give me some security and stability (which I need now).

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Franwith2and1 · 08/05/2020 20:58

I met my current partner when I was 48!

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Aquamarine1029 · 08/05/2020 21:03

Of course it's not too late! Just remember to keep your standards firmly in place, and never, EVER settle. The best is yet to come!

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 21:03

@Fran

How did you meet out of interest? What age was he?

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 21:06

@Aquamarine1029

Good advice - aim for the best!

Am actually only ready now, strangely enough. I had so much I wanted to sow ith my life, so many things I wanted to explore and I have got to the stage now where I am confident that I have done the things I wanted to do alone and enough with friends and family that I would like to now find a special partner. Might sound strange and I am not explaining it properly, probably.

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PamDemic · 08/05/2020 21:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Raidblunner · 08/05/2020 21:09

I met my current partner at 49...made a million by 39 lost a load in a divorce and bad deals. Worked my nutz off and mortgage free again at 53...nothing is impossible. Never put limits on what you can do! Tomorrow is always the start of the rest of your life.

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 21:09

Great name.

You are brave on Tinder. I started talking to someone on GS who was 50 and I felt like I was talking to a manager at work or my Dad. I cannot picture myself with men my age - I look at them and see old and sensible.

Confused

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 21:11

@Raidblunner


Yes, I believe that and live by that motto usually. Great story btw - very inspirational.

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okiedokieme · 08/05/2020 21:13

Not too late! I'm snuggled up with dp who I met on OLD.

You need to know it requires a thick skin to do OLD but it really can work!

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Jojobar · 08/05/2020 21:14

I fucking hope it's not too late OP, I will be the same age at my next birthday.

I'm recently single after what I thought was my forever relationship. I don't think I'm ready to date yet, Tinder etc make me feel a bit queasy. I hate all that forced small talk, and trying to make stilted conversation!

But I still hope I'll find the one. Somehow!

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 21:16

Part of me is unsure how to 'present' myself - not just physically but in who I am and where I am at. I feel like I have worked at a high level and taken on responsibility in life - I am an 'adult' but at the moment the job I am now going for is entry level, basic pay and I will start at the bottom and work my way up. I can make sense of that because I have other projects and things in place but I don't know how to convey all of that. I am also broke and I do feel that I get treated as though I 'm a bit of a loser/lost soul at times. There is usually a grand plan in my head and I always come good.

Don't really know what I'm saying here! I keep putting off meeting someone until I have finished my latest project but have realised that I need to change that if I want to meet someone now - and now I don't know where to start

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Raidblunner · 08/05/2020 21:43

You just made an 'Unlucky Dip' nowt wrong with us 50 somethings. Here I am at 53 on Mumsnet trying to learn something, sick to the back teeth of Facebook and all its covid/political misery. Just keep at the dating, it's great fun.

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 21:48

Yes, just a temporary dip as we all have to navigate in life. Perhaps better to look for someone once I 'm on top of this dip and further along the way into something solid.

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georgialondon · 08/05/2020 21:56

Of course! You might not even be halfway through your life!

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 22:19

That's true @georgialondon


We might live to be a 100 - by then we might all be part replaced with cyber bits!

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Mrskeats · 08/05/2020 22:22

I met my now dh at 49

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Lazingonasunnyafternoon20 · 08/05/2020 22:41

@Mrskeats tell me more. I need stories of inspiration Grin

Where did you meet?

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TomHardysBitontheside · 08/05/2020 23:02

I met my DP online almost two years ago, when I was 49. My ex-husband had left me about 18 months before.

In those 18 months I dipped in and out of online dating. I made some friends, had some great sex, met many idiots and was glued to the dating thread on here.

When I started talking to DP it just felt right. I was myself from the start. Also, we were open about what we wanted. We don't live together, and don't plan to, but we are very close and we have a great time together. I am sure we will be in each other's lives for a long time.

I highly recommend the dating thread on here though for lots of tips and sanity checks.

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Franwith2and1 · 08/05/2020 23:06

Match.com is where we met x

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Mrskeats · 08/05/2020 23:09

We met online as people seem to these days.
It's a case of having a thick skin and not over-investing before you meet.

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