Didn’t make a fuss about my birthday - again....

[Twentynone21]

So, I’m in a long-term relationship (years & years) 2 kids, dogs, cats, fish. He’s always shit on my birthday, why should this year be any different?!

I have a big birthday this year. We are in lockdown, I get that! But why does the stingy sod think it’s ok to give me a bottle of wine and supermarket flowers and then blame it on lockdown?? Not even a card cos the supermarket has run out.

It’s his birthday close to mine & I still got him a card from me and the kids and ordered him a present online.

He’s swanning around all moody and sad saying that he’s ruined everything as usual. Part of me doesn’t want to get cross because i foolishly took the day off work and it’ll make the atmosphere worse but I could strangle the selfish git!!!

[Shoxfordian]

He's a knob
It's my husband's birthday soon, I've got him lots of presents, a cake online and a card online. Lockdown is absolutely no excuse for this shit

[ChiaraRimini]

+++knob
So many online options to buy gifts, there's no excuse.
What's he like rest of the time?

[rvby]

Happy birthday op

You did say it yourself - this is how he always operates. Is there a reason you thought it would be different this year? Did he say he would try harder and that's why you took the day off etc?

Also why do you buy him presents if he doesn't reciprocate?

I'm asking these questions because I get the sense that you operate on hope quite a bit, which can unfortunately be a v painful way to live. It might be best to accept your partner as he is, it's very unlikely that he will change. To hope that he will, that way madness lies IMO.

[PatsyClinSilVousPlait]

I find birthdays excruciatingly naff, but he should at least play the game.

[Opaljewel]

Have you told him explicitly what you want from him and not just hoped? I guess some people need some direction if they aren't naturally like that. Tell him on your birthday you just want a bit of fuss. Breakfast in bed, a lie in maybe. Something nice he has seen that made him think of you. Use this as an opportunity to have your kind of day. And if he still won't do it then don't do it for him.

[Twentynone21]

Thank you for the birthday wishes!

I know lockdown is no excuse, I just needed to rant. We’ve been through quite a bad patch recently, caused by him, and I stupidly thought he would try a bit harder, especially as it’s a special birthday for me. I buy him a card and present as an example to the kids and help them get stuff too. Oh well that’s the last time I will bother. He’s a knob!

[Truthpact]

Is his birthday after yours? If so, send the gift back and give him the card and the bottle of wine.