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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Intimacy

7 replies

Grindsmygears · 01/05/2020 22:42

I'm having a bit of an issue with the lack of intimacy being shown by my partner, we cuddle daily but anything else needs to be initiated by me and more often than not is ignored, they will kiss back but make no effort to lean in first or continue if I stop. Also when they know I'm in the mood this is often met by them rolling over to face the other way and telling me to "take care of it myself." I know they enjoy sex when it happens but I'm worried this will grow resentment and makes me feel unwanted

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CyberNan · 01/05/2020 22:46

they...?
them..?
how many are there?

if a bloke told me to "take care of it myself" I would be gone. that is completely disrespectful. this bloke (assuming there is only one) is just not into you... move on

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Grindsmygears · 01/05/2020 22:48

There is only one, didn't mean to be vague

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Puddlejuice · 01/05/2020 22:52

Flipping heck there are so many threads on this running at the minute, scroll back through a few pages and the advice has all been done to death.

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Cosyblanky · 01/05/2020 22:53

My advice is you will end up feeling rejected, sad and resentful. Can you talk to your partner about this, find out where he's coming from and tell him how you feel?

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Candyfloss99 · 01/05/2020 23:05

How often do you actually have sex?

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Ohnoherewego62 · 02/05/2020 00:29

Are you male or female?

How long has this been going on for?

How well can you communicate with each other?

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Anothernick · 02/05/2020 07:13

The partner with the higher sex drive can expect to have to take care of themselves sometimes. My DW sometimes tells me to rub one out and I'm fine with that because I know we'll do it together in a day or two, I would be unhappy if she always told me to do it. I would not tell her to sort herself, I always do it for her if asked.

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