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Books to read....

(3 Posts)
Greenmum2019 Thu 30-Apr-20 09:45:02

Help.

I need empowerment. I need confidence to exist in my marriage. It's destroying my self worth and confidence. Even worse now in lockdown.

Books that will help me to get perspective on my marriage, work out if I should end it.
I am so lonely, so let down everyday. Trapped with three young kids. Stiffled by fear of doing the right thing for everyone.

Help pls I guess!

OP’s posts: |
AttilaTheMeerkat Thu 30-Apr-20 11:15:24

What is happening here in your marriage and have things got worse over time?.

What are the root causes of your fear (of what precisely. Is it money worries, fear of the unknown, fear of him?) and being trapped; is it your husband?.

You have written very little but this to me reads like you are in an abusive marriage. I would read "Why does he do that?" written by Lundy Bancroft. You also may want to contact Womens Aid?.

On a wider level what do you want to teach your children about relationships and what are they learning here from you two?. Would you want them to have a relationship like yours as adults, in all likelihood not. Staying mainly and simply because of for the sake of the children is rarely if ever a good idea.

Greenmum2019 Thu 30-Apr-20 14:37:26

Thanks.

It's is low level emotional abuse... I've been manipulated over time to be quiet and gas lighted to the point of struggling with simple communication with him. Nothing physical at all. My husband is hard working and very present. But controlling and emotionally unavailable. Not tenderness or intamacy. We are a busy family and it just rolls on day to day.

I want more for me, and good relationship role models for my kids. But practical reasons mean it's not a quick easy thing to end our marriage. Our youngest needs us both at home to support thier medical needs.

I will have a read of that book.

I need a way forward... Even if it's a slow process

OP’s posts: |

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