I created an account because I need advice. I have a mixed-race son (7) from a previous relationship where my son's father abandoned me. Met my husband who is also white, two years after, and he adores my son and treats him the same way as our daughter. His family has taken my son into their family and when we married, my son took his surname, and he adopted him. My husband has never had his own children, so I had a daughter (3) who is his only child. But my partner wants a big family and what I believe to be more of his own biological children.
The problem is our daughter was difficult to deal with - the sleepless nights, the tiredness as well as my son's own little naughty behaviour that comes with his age, which made it difficult. As well as this, the cost of having 3 children sounds a lot. As we like to go on holidays abroad, it would be more expensive. Childcare etc, getting a bigger car, potentially moving houses, general costs as well as university in the future. I quite like having two children for now but I also feel sorry for my husband who loves my son as his own, but doesn't want to have an only child too.
I'm pushing towards early 40s and my husband is in his early 30s. I also don't want him to cheat on me and have another child or resent me for denying him the chance of another child. I'm comfortable with 2 children and although I quite like the idea of a third child, I'm considering our financial stability and whether having a third child will affect us. Plus I also think about whether I'm mentally ready as I'm still looking after my daughter who is a toddler and how she would feel with the attention going to another child.
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Relationships
Partner wants to consider having another child but I'm unsure?
SadieM76 · 25/04/2020 20:47
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