We've been together 15 years, married for 8 and have a one year old. Whenever we argue he doesn't know when to stop. For example, since having DD I've had chronic back and pelvis pain that I can't shift (am seeing the right people to get it sorted) It really gets me down and I'm a bit limited in what I can do physically just now. DH suggested last night perhaps it was all psychosomatic which upset me enormously as he sees how I struggle. It was late at night and he apologised and fell asleep. Today he came and had a chat and I was telling him how hurtful comments like that are and how difficult I find things and got quite overwhelmed by it all, he pulls out of the bag how I make him feel thick and how things I say make him feel like shit at times. He'd never bring these things up normally despite me asking until he's in a situation where he feels he needs to be defensive. No matter how upset I am he just feels the need to put one last dig in. We had lunch all together and I tried to explain this to him a bit, calmly and he stormed off as I was 'putting him down in front of the baby'. I appreciate her being there (playing with toys) wasn't ideal. The coldness that comes from him in these situations is so unlike his normal self and he just doesn't care how upset it makes me. This used to happen on a monthly basis but hasnt for ages so perhaps more affecting.
Am I just making a big deal over nothing? It doesn't feel like it
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Relationships
DH doesn't know when to stop during arguments
8 replies
Joannat1980 · 25/04/2020 15:44
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