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Demanding to see in lockdown

(75 Posts)
Greenbean20 Wed 08-Apr-20 12:36:57

Just want to rant really (although know I should end things).
Have a boyfriend of less than a year, has been on and off.
We have separate houses with children each.
He had asked to come round to my house Friday as not working over Easter (when the children are in bed, we're both missing sex). I said to wait until after lockdown is reviewed on Monday and then see what the guidelines are (which now looks to not be announced and lockdown to continue further).
Obviously it'd be wrong to see each other currently.
He's said there's no point seeing each other for months then and hinted there's no point continuing.
I'm disappointed he expects me to put him before my childrens health and that nothing I've said makes much difference, he's just said I should trust him.

mbosnz Wed 08-Apr-20 12:41:50

I wouldn't trust him as far as I could bloody throw him with that attitude.

Fedup2020 Wed 08-Apr-20 12:47:09

He sounds like a jerk. Bin him

category12 Wed 08-Apr-20 12:48:45

Why's he turned it into being about "trusting him"? Bloody weirdo.

It's of the same attitude as "I'll pull out honest" and "I've never been tested but I'm 'clean'".

Trying to push over reasonable boundaries with emotional blackmail bullshit about "trust" - tell him he's a jerk and to piss off.

Greenbean20 Wed 08-Apr-20 13:01:47

Thanks, it's because I'm so cautious with virus.
I've reduced my hours to be able to look after my children and work from home. We've had no contact with anyone since lockdown, keeping apart and other than local walks, only going to a small local Express for everything we need.
He's not concerned and considers himself and his children healthy, believing it affects older and ill people. He's working so in contact with more people, driving for long walks with picnics, shopping at supermarkets and shopping malls to buy everything needs. So has been in contact with alot more people, even if distancing.
Therefore believes I should trust him that he knows what he's doing!

category12 Wed 08-Apr-20 13:03:45

Well, you'd definitely know where you got it from, but I doubt that would comfort you.

FabbyChix Wed 08-Apr-20 13:04:01

Tell him to wank and treat him to some
Tissues

EarlGreyT Wed 08-Apr-20 13:07:57

What a twat. Yes, you should end things.

*He's not concerned and considers himself and his children healthy, believing it affects older and ill people. He's working so in contact with more people, driving for long walks with picnics, shopping at supermarkets and shopping malls to buy everything needs. So has been in contact with alot more people, even if distancing.
Therefore believes I should trust him that he knows what he's doing!*

The above tells me (and anyone with any sense) that you definitely should not trust him and no, he has not got a fucking clue what he is doing.

EarlGreyT Wed 08-Apr-20 13:08:56

Sorry bold fail

What a twat. Yes, you should end things.

He's not concerned and considers himself and his children healthy, believing it affects older and ill people. He's working so in contact with more people, driving for long walks with picnics, shopping at supermarkets and shopping malls to buy everything needs. So has been in contact with alot more people, even if distancing.
Therefore believes I should trust him that he knows what he's doing!

The above tells me (and anyone with any sense) that you definitely should not trust him and no, he has not got a fucking clue what he is doing.

Greenbean20 Wed 08-Apr-20 13:14:10

He's just texted saying him and his children have no symptoms. That we're not at risk and it's in place to stop elderly/sick catching it, not us.
This is someone who's supposed to be in love with me and has met my children.

WarmFunKindStrong Wed 08-Apr-20 13:17:06

He's thinking with his knob.

ChateauMyself Wed 08-Apr-20 13:23:00

At least you know sooner rather than later that when he doesn’t get his own way will...
* emotionally blackmail you
* sow seed of self doubt in you
* puts his dick’s need above all others

You’ve had an early warning - use it.

TeapotCollection Wed 08-Apr-20 13:26:13

Bullet well and truly dodged there, bin him

WotchaTalkinBoutWillis Wed 08-Apr-20 13:29:55

Say bye then.
He's being a dick, at least he's showing you as much early on.

I'm disappointed he expects me to put him before my childrens health and that nothing I've said makes much difference, he's just said I should trust him

This doesn't even make sense. What's he on about?
Trust him about what?
Trust him that he doesn't have the virus?! confused
Anybody can get it, which is the whole bloody POINT of lockdown!
It's not an issue of trust, he's being a knob.

Greenbean20 Wed 08-Apr-20 13:30:12

Thanks, it's good to hear that I'm not being 'over the top' about him (or even how we're living).

Honeyroar Wed 08-Apr-20 13:31:13

He sounds like he’s shown you his true, totally selfish character. Threatening to dump you (pretty much) if he had to wait until lockdown is over is disgusting. I’d have told him good luck with finding someone else as careless as you.

Do not put yourself and your kids at risk for a man who wants a shag.

Barbararara Wed 08-Apr-20 13:35:02

He’s not very intelligent if he hasn’t grasped that people younger than pension age are dying, and that it can be spread asymptomatically.

I do understand that people who have to keep working in dangerous situations can erect all sorts of psychological barriers to protect themselves from the awareness of the danger they’re in. But that doesn’t mean you should suspend your common sense.

Also, the words “trust me” as your boundaries are tested is a massive red flag.

Embracelife Wed 08-Apr-20 13:37:28

He just wants sex.
Tell him The relationship is over.
Are you going to risk you and your dc for him?

madcatladyforever Wed 08-Apr-20 13:39:37

Nice to know that in his mind his penis trumps your kids potential deaths.
I'd give him a big piece of my mind.

Aussiebean Wed 08-Apr-20 13:44:46

Has he read a recent news report? Everything that he is saying is from over a month ago. We know better now. Young people are dying from this sad children, babies and people with no underlining health issues.

Plus you are infectious way before you show sings. He could come, infect you and leave before any symptoms show

You are protecting your babies just as he should be.

PinkMonkeyBird Wed 08-Apr-20 13:46:19

Dump the selfish arsehole.

noyoucannotcomein Wed 08-Apr-20 13:49:31

Dump him for being thick as shit, as well as selfish, arrogant, and bloody ignorant.

If he can find somebody else to have sex with during lockdown then they bloody well deserve each other. If not, he's destroyed his relationship for nothing. Twat.

mbosnz Wed 08-Apr-20 13:53:40

What a complete and utter dickhead. And a thick one to boot. . .

I'd be telling him not to bother getting in touch again, just to get some hankies and upgrade his porn subscription. . .

BackseatCookers Wed 08-Apr-20 14:12:45

Please tell me you aren't going to continue talking to him?!

He sounds like a dick, to an embarrassing degree.

The stuff he said to you has made me cringe, ugh.

He should have made your decision very easy, no way should you continue a relationship with him.

Wanderlust21 Wed 08-Apr-20 14:14:18

So basically he is hinting he will end things if you dont agree to let him come round?

Eh yeh, he's a manipulative shitehead. Wouldn't want someone like that anywhere near me or my kids.

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