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Dating Thread 187 - Love in the Time of Corona

(456 Posts)
JeSuisPrest Sat 21-Mar-20 12:27:12

The Rules:
1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread.
11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated
12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with
13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future
14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

Eesha Sat 21-Mar-20 13:05:28

@JeSuisPrest Thanks for the new thread!

@notcoolmum there isn't a right or wrong, do what suits you both best

Definitely no new dates, I'm interested to see whether we still will end up meeting post this isolation period. I previously have written off younger men (he is 37 to my 42) but he's actually quite nice so might try it!

TigerDater Sat 21-Mar-20 14:01:22

jesuis you’re a star for creating the new thread, thank you 😊

SimonJT Sat 21-Mar-20 14:36:47

@Unambiguousbeard No, his cough only lasted two days. As of today he no longer needs isolating, genuinely considering sending him to my friends for the week!

@shitwithsugaron Yeah, he’s five in June, he’s generally been quite good, he was a nightmare yesterday and I could have killed the little bugger. Our flat is really small, so there’s nowhere to escape! I have started locking the door when I go on the balcony for a cigarette, actual peace and quiet.

My new weights have arrived and I’ve fixed my pull up bar. This will make me a nicer person to live with.

Thank you for the new thread!

AutumnHaze Sat 21-Mar-20 14:58:58

Hi @notcoolmum, echoing what others have said about doing what‘s right for you. For me, I have now decided no meets until this is over on the basis that he cannot get full home office from his work and I have an issue with the massive contagion factor of this thing. Earlier this week though I saw him every day as I was anxious with all the deadlines (tax, court cases, my work, final prepping etc) and he actually offered to look at and talk it though with me. He came up trumps and I knocked it all off one by one.
So there is me on the smitten bench (only three months so far, we shall see) After all this time, what‘s a few weeks and we are being good citizens by Staying Home. Thank god for FaceTime. Good luck whatever you decide.

SingleDadReally Sat 21-Mar-20 15:15:20

My wife walked out on me more than 2 years ago. Since last August I’ve had a lovely, platonic, tactile relationship with a local lady. We’ve agreed not to see each other for a while. I work in the NHS (in admin, but I’ve volunteered to more directly support the frontline) and she works in a school remaining open for key workers, so we need to avoid infection if at all possible. We keep in touch by text at least once a day to check on each other’s health.

midcenturylegs Sat 21-Mar-20 16:07:59

Jumping on here to say hi.. it's been about 13 months since I've posted on here but have been focussing on ASD DD and my vulnerable elderly family and not dating.

I've a couple of friends who in the midst of this pandemic think everything is fine and continuing to date. I don't care if you slate me - but - fgs - please please look at what is happening in Italy and this is with lock-down..

midcenturylegs Sat 21-Mar-20 16:11:29

My best friend's mum-in-law in Italy died today. She had no contact with anyone apart from ONE postman over the last 4 weeks, they kept 6 feet apart.

I just ask, please put this dating desperation aside until this virus has gone?

dancemom Sat 21-Mar-20 16:17:42

Checking in

Just as well we are social distancing as I have zero irons 🙄

Really pissed off too as my ex who I discovered was married is back on the dating sites claiming to be single and using a photo I took of him!! 😡😡

Really wish I'd actually told his wife at the time ...

bangheadhere40 Sat 21-Mar-20 16:19:47

Checking irons too

unambiguousbeard Sat 21-Mar-20 17:11:28

Hi @midcenturylegs peanuthedz as was here. I dont t think any of us are actually dating currently. If you read the last thread there's talk of FaceTime/sexting etc but I do t think anyone is setting up new dates. Not on here anyway. People are meeting their BFs etc but not dating.

unambiguousbeard Sat 21-Mar-20 17:12:49

I also object to the term "dating desperation". I haven't been dating for a long time and I'm fine with that but some people on here do want to date. It's not desperation.

Notcoolmum Sat 21-Mar-20 17:24:30

Hi @midcenturylegs I'm truly sorry to hear about your mum's friend. That's devastating. I don't consider myself to be in 'dating desperation'. But I am weighing up whether seeing my BF is an unnecessary risk or, on balance, any more risky than those who live with partners. I'm still unsure.

Dancerinthemoonlight Sat 21-Mar-20 17:35:01

I saw Mr Army last night because I hadn't seen him in 2 weeks and with everything going on we don't know when we will get to see each other again.
I'm hoping the infection and death rate is now going to slow rapidly and look toward it diminishing with more people taking the social distancing seriously.
Mr Army and I weighed up the chance and as neither of us were/are displaying any signs or symptoms or have knowingly been near anyone who has been we decided it was worth the risk.
Post sex hormones have caught up with me and I am hugely wishing I was still with him. Haven't heard from him yet today but hopefully I will this evening

midcenturylegs Sat 21-Mar-20 19:56:06

I know my comments were quite brutal - they weren't directed at anyone here. The 'desperate dating' comment was about someone in particular - not here I think - but she is shrugging her shoulders to all social distancing rules to date and then and looking after peoples kids - I'm really pissed off.

dollface19 Sat 21-Mar-20 20:08:10

@midcenturylegs that's so sad but did the MIL have any underlying conditions and how old was she ? It's a horrible disease and one to avoid completely if possible but we don't know enough about it and it's impossible to avoid, and no one is setting up new dates on here that I'm aware of. I'm not anyway I've been seeing my 'bf'a while and known him over 10 years my 'bf' isn't high risk and has been goin to work and home that's it.
I am a mild asthmatic but it's very mild and well controlled. I'm sorry to hear your friend isn't listening x

unambiguousbeard Sat 21-Mar-20 20:26:30

Sorry @midcenturylegs I guess we're all a bit touchy. Or should I say not touchy. Yes people are being daft. Actually not daft just really ducking stupid. We will all be on total lockdown next week hopefully. I can't believe I'm hoping that will happen but honestly. A friend of mine has been traipsing all over town with her Dh who is ill. I pointed out it's probably corona and she said oh no it can't be he's got flu symptoms. For 7 days. Speechless.

I can't imagine dating will be a realistic prospect any time soon. I guess that's partly why I'm touchy.

unambiguousbeard Sat 21-Mar-20 20:27:46

And I also understand @midcenturylegs your need to tell someone off so venting here at us virtual daters rather than your friends. Apologies again.

Lovemusic33 Sat 21-Mar-20 20:51:10

I think dating is over for me, I was meant to be meeting up with Mr Ski tomorrow but it seems he’s not taking the virus seriously and has been continuing as normal (going to gym and dance classes), I have been isolating most of the week and have stopped going to the gym. I didn’t want to risk going to see him. He’s hardly messaged me since so I’m guessing he will vanish. This could possibly be the longest period of “no sex” since I was married 🤣

Notcoolmum Sat 21-Mar-20 21:09:49

No need to apologise MCL it's a really scary time. As an anxious person anyway I'm worried about every decision I make right now. Going to the shops. Seeing my mum tomorrow. My BF. My DD getting a shelf stacking job. Walking with a friend. 🤯

Menora Sat 21-Mar-20 21:14:54

Mr M seems to have finally realised what an idiot he has been about being socially reckless
I honestly think a lot of people just don’t get it

Aside from him anyways my house has never been so clean!
Turns out someone from last sat night I went out with has CV so I am waiting and watching. I was hugging her and everything so I myself have been irresponsible

TwoOpenOneClosed Sat 21-Mar-20 21:16:23

Hi guys, I haven't been on here for a while just tend to lurk but just feeling a bit lonely and no one to chat to.
I am sort of seeing someone but he texted me this morning at 7am before I woke up I replied when I woke up but then nothing all day, he's read my message why do men do this and completely ignore you all day 🙁

unambiguousbeard Sat 21-Mar-20 21:30:37

@Menora the world was a different place last Saturday. We weren't social distancing then. I went to the pub with a load of friends and we all hugged each other goodnight. As you do. However going to the pub last night was a really stupid thing to do. What a difference a few days makes...

Menora Sat 21-Mar-20 21:35:02

It’s just shit
I feel shit emotionally etc
My DC are thankfully pretty savvy and not causing me any hassle
But we are missing a lot of essential items I can’t find online so I need to go to a shop tomorrow and brave the masses of twats

Lovemusic33 Sat 21-Mar-20 21:53:10

Menora I have to go to look for missing food items tomorrow too, will be trying the local spar before going to any supermarket, my anxiety is awful at the moment and I have stayed away from supermarkets.

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