Advanced search

Devastated by conviction for child sex abuse images - need a handhold. Trigger Warning *title edited by MNHQ*

(120 Posts)
thisstorywtf Thu 27-Feb-20 04:05:36

NC for this. My PhD supervisor, mentor and friend. WTF? Am reeling.

PatricksRum Thu 27-Feb-20 04:13:54

Two year community order. I despair.
No advice OP, haven't been in anything similar but didn't want r&r. Hope you're ok

Socalm Thu 27-Feb-20 04:16:35

£340 and 180 hours volunteer work? Thats not very harsh, is it.

thisstorywtf Thu 27-Feb-20 04:18:55

Patrick Thank you for replying. I am awake at 4 in the morning and trying to deal with it. Childhood sexual abuse survivor - I didn't notice any red flags. Known him professionally for nearly 20 years - travelled with him, went for coffee, he cleaned my kitchen after a knee op, shook my son's hand after my viva. And now this.

Socalm Thu 27-Feb-20 04:19:10

I'm sorry, OP. That must be horrible to find that out about someone you know well

thisstorywtf Thu 27-Feb-20 04:24:34

Socalm I have not read the article that I posted because I can't bear to. I found out from a friend at work. The actual sentence (tonight at least) is almost irrelevant - the emotional fallout is devastating IYSWIM? It will reverberate on all of his colleagues, and I can't even begin to imagine the impact on his wife, grown sons and his grandchild. The situation is hideous.

ShriekingBansheela Thu 27-Feb-20 04:26:32

£340 and 180 hours volunteer work? Thats not very harsh, is it

The judges reasoning is outrageous.

OP, really sorry. A terrible shock for you. Very disturbing.

maras2 Thu 27-Feb-20 04:30:56

He was DD's tutor too. sad
She's devastated.

thisstorywtf Thu 27-Feb-20 04:33:39

Maras so sorry. All his colleagues and former students will be reeling. It's hideous.

ShriekingBansheela Thu 27-Feb-20 04:40:33

The fallout is horrible: OP as you say all his friends and family are also his indirect victims , and of course it is devastating.

The anger will be immense. The material included extreme videos. And the judge more or less explained it away by someone finding themselves at a loose end in retirement accidentally getting involved with the wrong crowd. Utterly dismissive to the primary victims of CSA.

Mummyoflittledragon Thu 27-Feb-20 04:52:06

I’m so sorry for how you are feeling.

He had a category A movie - I had to look up the categories - Category A mean penetration. He got a fine, which for him would be pocket change, a few years on the sex register and community fucking service. That’s really going to deter others from accessing child abuse images. Makes my blood boil.

The judge needs to be disbarred.

thisstorywtf Thu 27-Feb-20 04:57:56

I am veering from anger, sadness and disbelief. I will process it in the coming days because God dammit I I have had enough practice. But tonight, or this morning, it's just a bit fucking much.

PatricksRum Thu 27-Feb-20 05:15:24

Sorry to hear you suffered abuse too OP.
I guess the only silver lining is that at least now you know.

boopboo Thu 27-Feb-20 05:18:04

How awful. That’s my university. I didn’t have him for lectures but know of him. What a downfall sad another professor friend of mine lost the plot when he retired. Total nervous breakdown. That sentence isn’t good enough. I guess because he’s taken steps to rehabilitate himself it’s why they went easy on him?

florababy84 Thu 27-Feb-20 05:22:37

I'm absolutely stunned by the judge's sentencing and comments. Just floored...

Mummyoflittledragon Thu 27-Feb-20 05:27:29

I forgot to say. It is no longer called child porn as this suggests child consent / collaboration. Child sex abuse images.

Selfsettling3 Thu 27-Feb-20 05:28:34

You know there is no such thing as ‘child porn’, this phrase normalises videos of children of being sexually abused.

Luckystar777 Thu 27-Feb-20 05:32:24

Sadly it's often a person you would least suspect. A relative abused me and I'm sure most would never believe it. It's true though.

thisstorywtf Thu 27-Feb-20 05:41:30

Mummy yes you are right - it is not child porn, it is child abuse. I am a rad fem in my normal life (for obvious fucking reasons) , but this morning I am an eleven year old girl with an abusive stepfather. So my rational, articulate self is taking a back seat. I posted in relationships rather than FWR, because I need a handhold rather than feminist theory. Sorry everyone else.

WombOfOnesOwn Thu 27-Feb-20 05:49:41

Regular porn is also images of abuse. Pornography is exploitative and abusive, and regular abusers of women are more likely to abuse children as well in any realm, this included.

Clymene Thu 27-Feb-20 05:50:10

So the judge blamed his paedophilia on isolation after retirement? So much sympathy for the perpetrator, so little thought for his victims.

I'm so sorry OP, what a terrible shock thanks

Mummyoflittledragon Thu 27-Feb-20 05:50:41

I am really sorry to read what you wrote about yourself. My post wasn’t judging you, rather just to give you a heads up. flowers

thisstorywtf Thu 27-Feb-20 05:52:33

Mummy i know. But today I just need the handhold.

Mummyoflittledragon Thu 27-Feb-20 05:53:44

<hand hold> and big hugs my love.

thisstorywtf Thu 27-Feb-20 05:54:41

Thank you. It's all a bit much.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »