Why has my ex unblocked me on WhatsApp?

(53 Posts)
andifyouever Thu 13-Feb-20 11:17:14

A month ago I broke up with my boyfriend.
I still have feelings for him but he wasn't treating me the best.
We had a big argument and he said he was done.
He waited 2 weeks then deleted me off social media and blocked me on WhatsApp (I hadn't been texting him he just randomly did it)
Now this morning I had a look (I admit I keep checking ) and he has unblocked me.
Why ? He only blocked me 13 days ago.
If he was totally done would he unblock me?

OP’s posts: |
TwentyViginti Thu 13-Feb-20 11:23:27

He's waiting for you to get in touch and grovel to him to take you back? He wasn't treating you well - so just block him and move on.

RamonaLark Thu 13-Feb-20 11:24:22

What he is or isn’t feeling is irrelevant. Only how you deserve to be treated and how you feel matters.

Bartlet Thu 13-Feb-20 11:28:24

Because he’s toying with you? Because he wants to see if you’ll contact him for an ego boost?

If he was seriously wanting to get in touch he would. It’s rather cruel what he’s doing. Please try to avoid the temptation to contact him.

toast1123 Thu 13-Feb-20 11:30:04

Because he wants to see if you’ll contact him for an ego boost? yep.

SoupDragon Thu 13-Feb-20 11:33:15

Block him instead.

PixieRabbit Thu 13-Feb-20 11:34:56

Who cares what he’s thinking?

BLOCK HIM and work on your self esteem. You know you deserve better.


Peignoir Thu 13-Feb-20 11:35:54

Block him and move on. These social media games are so pretty.

Babyg1995 Thu 13-Feb-20 11:35:58

He's playing with you block him .

andifyouever Thu 13-Feb-20 11:36:45

When it first ended I wanted answers about why he was behaving so awful.
So I text him and sent him a few voice notes as we was ignoring me.
Then he went on to say it was my fault and I had caused this then we argued again and it totally ended.

OP’s posts: |
AlwaysOnAbloodyDiet Thu 13-Feb-20 11:37:00

I read an article somewhere once about the psychology about blocking and unblocking on social media.
It seems that it's not necessarily true that the blocker unblocks and wants the person to contact them, but often it means that the blocker has moved on, is no longer angry, no longer holds any feelings for the person they've blocked. So they 'unblock'.
I know it sounds confusing, but it made sense when I read it.

Try and 'let go' and stop checking. (Easier said than done, I know)

andifyouever Thu 13-Feb-20 11:37:10


OP’s posts: |
Crystal87 Thu 13-Feb-20 11:37:46

He wants to see if you'll realise you've been unlocked and immediately message him. He's playing games.

andifyouever Thu 13-Feb-20 11:38:49

I had been checking to see if he would unblock as I had a feeling that's what he would do.

OP’s posts: |
AlwaysOnAbloodyDiet Thu 13-Feb-20 11:38:56

If you block him now, he'll know that you know he unblocked you, meaning that you've been checking.

I wouldn't give him that satisfaction.

Just ignore it.

andifyouever Thu 13-Feb-20 11:42:37

Yeah I would never message him now.
I think he owes me an apology but I doubt I will get it.
He's very stubborn and is never wrong (in his eyes )

OP’s posts: |
Valkadin Thu 13-Feb-20 11:43:17

Because he can and it’s making you wonder and think about him. Please block him because as you write he was not treating you the best. If you take him back I guarantee he will still treat you badly and becuse you have taken him back he will be safe in the knowledge that you are compliant. Though him treating you badly will take a while. Then you will be thinking but he can be so lovely and you will doubt yourself.

It’s how women get in to abusive relationships. They test you, a woman with healthy boundaries and robust self esteem would not consider him. I’m telling you this because I was in a very abusive relationship when I was young but I had come from an incredibly abusive background, social services were involved in my family and my sister was removed.

I’m not asking you to splurge your childhood and younger life on here as you may not be comfortable doing so. But ask yourself why you would even consider for a second a man who treats you badly. Believe me when I say all of my sisters have been in abusive relationships and it all stems from our childhood.

Lollygaggles Thu 13-Feb-20 11:43:50

Please delete him then you won't keep torturing yourself. A person who plays games with your feelings isn't worthy of your emotional energy. flowers

WinterCat Thu 13-Feb-20 11:46:25

Don’t block him. Just delete his messages and his contact details so he’s not on your phone anymore and don’t give him the satisfaction of being blocked.

I’m someone who has blocked people in the past (never an ex, but sometimes gossipy work colleagues) on social media and when I unblock it’s because I no longer give them headspace and have moved on so I agree that is likely to be a reason.

Valkadin Thu 13-Feb-20 11:49:00

You will never get a truthful answer as to why he treats you badly. The real answer is he is not a good or nice or kind person. He will not say I enjoy being cruel and feeling like I have power over another person will he and that is sadly the most likely truthful answer. I had a man who toyed with me emotionally. I also had a man who used to beat me. I can say the one who emotionally destroyed with words and actions has had a worse effect on me.

HunterHearstHelmsley Thu 13-Feb-20 11:49:16

Could have had a new phone. You have to block again on WhatsApp.

BecauseReasons Thu 13-Feb-20 11:51:35

Block him and delete, OP. It doesn't matter if he's suddenly decided to tattoo your face onto his ballsack- you're not together. He's not a good partner. Block, delete and on you move.

YasssKween Thu 13-Feb-20 11:54:48

It doesn't matter why.

Block him and draw a line under it.


Cheeseandwin5 Thu 13-Feb-20 12:08:04

I am not sure why posters seem to be being so negative to the OP Ex. I assume that is just the MNs way.
In my view, in a fit of anger , unhappiness and frustration about the end of your relationship he deleted your details. Now he may want to leave the channels open with you, with the possibility of a reconciliation.
It is really up to you what you do with this. If you do not want anything to do with him , than delete his contact, if you feel you may want to resume the relationship if changes are made than keep it and whenever you are sure you can either send him a hello and see how things are or block him.

BecauseReasons Thu 13-Feb-20 12:15:56

I am not sure why posters seem to be being so negative to the OP Ex.

Because, in my experience, of a relationship failed once, it'll fail again. Particularly if, as in the OP's case, one treated the other so badly that an apology or explanation is warranted. People waste years on this on-again-off-again nonsense. I advise OP not to bother.

Join the discussion

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet

Already have a Mumsnet account? Log in