Hi everyone. I sense that some encouragement is needed! The throws, sofas, cushions, and alcohol aren’t working.
@Bigpooh13, the no contact is hard but will pay off as you get stronger. Nightmares are your brain processing what’s happened. They are horrible but necessary, as is the crying. Hang in there and distract yourself with job applications and frequent cups of tea and biscuits. Ask yourself ‘what have I done today to make me feel proud’, which @ThelmaAndLouise2020 will recognise as a runner’s theme tune. I’ve just seen that you are at CAB for advice. You are mighty. You have definitely done something today to make you feel proud.
@caketimeisover, put the stick you’re beating yourself with down immediately. You did brilliantly to get through the weekend without your kids. You will plan better next time, but perhaps you needed to grieve this time to make next time more comfortable.
@ASmallBoxofChocolateBunnies, you have a good, appropriately boundary-filled week too. Thanks again for starting our cosy new thread.
@SoTiredTonight, the advantage of keeping yourself busy is that you get lots done, although it seems to take me twice as long to do anything. I spent ages this morning looking for something that I needed. I found it eventually but I was cursing the time wasted. My distractions need to be more organised. They are a bit random at present.
@Stillfunny, oh cashmere, how luxurious. I’m imagining you with a bone China tea cup and a lovely Belgian chocolate biscuit ...
@Debis, hi there. I’m so, so sorry for what you are going through. I completely understand the coldness and lack of care. Your breakdown sounds terrible. Have you got some ongoing support? What about friends, family. You will be thinking that you don’t want to be a burden but I promise you you won’t be. Feeling low and crying is normal so go with the flow. Do you have children? Your marriage was something to you and it will have meant something to him too. His behaviour is not your fault and you can’t control it. All you can do is control your reaction to it, but that is very difficult. Focus on you and what you can do to help yourself.
@Tinydancer123, you are in a slump but you are so strong. Warrior up!
@Wineisafruit, hope you’re ok too?
I’ll report on my CBT later once I have thought about it a little. I think I found it helpful (there’s homework which I like).
😀😀, stay strong 💪 xx