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Cheating Husband

(963 Posts)
RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 21:47:50

I’ve followed so many of these threads recently but didn’t think I’d be starting one. I’ve had suspicions about my DH for a while.A few months ago he hired a new female member of staff and has not stopped talking about her since. Coincidentally he has been going to the gym every day, lost weight, bought new underwear and after shave etc. I have bumped into his colleagues tonight and had a drink with them. One of them told me too much. He has been shagging her for a while apparently. Wtf do I do. He’s out with them now. Sorry if this is garbled. I do not want to spoilt Christmas for my children. But what do I do

puds11 Fri 20-Dec-19 21:49:51

His colleague told you?

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 21:50:22

Not the one who he is shagging. A different one

puds11 Fri 20-Dec-19 21:55:56

Are they now likely to tell him they told you? You need to find some more evidence so that he cannot minimise or say it was a joke.

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 22:13:28

I’ve been stupid, I sent him a text implying that I know. I shouldn’t have. How do I get evidence? I don’t know his phone passcode etc

Krazynights34 Fri 20-Dec-19 22:18:01

I’m so sorry. Is there any chance it’s just gossip?

Almost40andweeping Fri 20-Dec-19 22:33:31

He’s out with her now? Well you either brazen it out and confront the fucker or pretend you don’t know and start snooping.
I’d chop my husbands cock off if I knew.

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 22:33:45

I don’t I think so. His colleague is a woman I get on well with and she had had a few drinks and told me she thought I should know. I don’t have proof but I do believe her. Things have been shit for a while, he’s been sleeping in the spare room a lot. I want to kick him out, but not ruin Christmas for the children.

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 22:35:43

I think she’s out yes. If I knew how to get proof I would. I had a funny feeling something was going on a while back and I tried to look at his phone but he had changed his passcode. She is married with young children.

ChaosisntapitChaosisaladder19 Fri 20-Dec-19 22:35:45

Its highly likely to be truth what's the point in waiting for evidence.

Mrsmummy90 Fri 20-Dec-19 22:36:18

I'd kick him out on his arse. Don't give him the opportunity to lie or worm his way out of it.

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 22:38:30

I guess I want evidence so he can’t deny it. I know he will! Can I kick him out? We have so many plans for Christmas is it crazy to think I can hang on till then?

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 22:39:11

This woman apparently said the sex is amazing and that he is planning to leave me for her after Christmas

Weenurse Fri 20-Dec-19 22:39:26

Do you think you can hold it together over Christmas?
If not end it today

Weenurse Fri 20-Dec-19 22:41:06

Use your knowledge to get all the important documents together and look at joint accounts.
If he is planning to leave, he may already be a step ahead of you.

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 22:41:09

I’m going to try. He is out drinking now so there’s nothing I can do tonight

SpicyRibs Fri 20-Dec-19 22:41:15

What's your plan for tonight when his comes home? Will you confront him or wait until Christmas is over?

666onmyhead Fri 20-Dec-19 22:41:44

Depends on your acting skills . If you can't faux happy family's for a week then just pack him a bag and tell him to bugger off .

Stillfunny Fri 20-Dec-19 22:41:50

It is true. That woman would have no reason to lie to you.
What a shit time to find out. Try and keep calm, don't do anything while you are in an emotional state.
I would let him know, agree to get through Xmas for the children. Then tell him that he has to get the hell out.
Do you have anyone that you can talk to in RL? That will try to support you to get through this.
Another shit guy .But sometimes you think WTF is also wrong with a woman that goes with a married man with kids. ? !
Does nobody have any morals or conscience any more ?
So sorry for you.flowers

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 22:44:07

We are not in a great situation financially. Just taken on a big mortgage and lots of debts etc. He’ll be back late tonight I think and I’ll be asleep. Plus he’ll be drunk. I can’t stop shaking

RoxanneMonke Fri 20-Dec-19 22:47:05

Thank you. He has never shown any signs of anything like this in 15 years. It’s just recently I’ve had a funny feeling. Things have been shit between us, he’s been very snappy and verbally aggressive at times.
We have plans with the kids tomorrow and they are so excited, I can’t ruin it for them. I need to carry on I think.

BumbleBeee69 Fri 20-Dec-19 22:52:32

I want to kick him out, but not ruin Christmas for the children.

HE did that for you.. HE ruined Christmas for his family but shagging someone else... you don't need any more proof.. you know this is true.. pack his stuff and leave it at the door.. flowers

SurfingGiantess Fri 20-Dec-19 23:03:00

I'd probably txt him I know and then pack his bag and leave it outside.
You can still do the things with the kids.
He will probably be too hungover anyway.
He ruined Christmas not you. He did that all by himself. Find your anger and tell him not to come home.

QueenoftheBiscuitTin Fri 20-Dec-19 23:32:44

I'd leave a bag outside and tell him it isn't necessary to wait until after Christmas, he can fuck off now.

Redlocks28 Fri 20-Dec-19 23:36:40

One of them told me too much. He has been shagging her for a while apparently.

She’s married with young children-what a fucking pair! I’d be tempted to tell her husband!

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