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My husband just slammed a door on me repeatedly

(388 Posts)

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WhatTheChuffJustHappened Sat 19-Oct-19 10:00:19

Trapping my wrist, bruising and cutting it.
In front of the kids no less.

H and I have been together for 21 years, he's never raised a hand to me or even come close.

We moved out of our house into a tiny gritty nasty flat while we buy a house. No one wanted to, we all hate it but a long boring back story means we have no choice.

DH is a miserable arsehole every Sunday. I don't know why but he is, he speaks to us all like shit until the afternoon when nice DH comes out.
We're all sick of it. Knowing we were going to be in a tiny flat this weekend I offered for him to stay at hotel, I would pay, we all get a break.
He said he would stay at a friends tonight.

Instead he has extended his Sunday arseholeness to Saturdays.

We had a minor dispute about some medicine while he was holding the baby.

He then flipped out and slammed the kitchen door in my face - literally. I tried coming out and he kept slamming it shut, catching my wrist and slamming it again still.

I got out and I try getting the baby off him but he's pushing me, hard. I start to panic as he's holding the baby and I hit his arm. He then puts the baby in the sofa but towers over him so I can't pick him up.

I'm panicking and shouting at him to give me the baby and get out.
I pick up the remote control and hit him on the back repeatedly until he gets away from
The baby.

I pick the baby up and tell him to get out. My voice is shaking and he mocks it.

He eventually agrees to go after a torrent of lies.
He said he slammed the kitchen door because I started hitting him. That all this was because I kicked his clothes this morning (I did neither, there were no clothes and I was putting meds back in the fridge when he slammed the door, fridge and door directly next door to each other) he shouts that it's all my fault that he is the way he is.

I say fine, it's all my fault, I tried to fix that by giving him us a break in a hotel. But now he's still like this.

He took my door key so I couldn't lock him out.
To said I would take the kids to a hotel and he chucked the key back

I've now locked him out.

Fuck sake.

Youngatheart00 Sat 19-Oct-19 10:01:47

You must report this to the police once you are somewhere safe. How is your wrist? You poor thing.

Wildorchidz Sat 19-Oct-19 10:03:07

I’d call the police.

FredaFrogspawn Sat 19-Oct-19 10:04:26

That sounds really messy. Your baby must have been terrified. It doesn’t seem a very healthy relationship. I hope you’re ok. Do you need a doctor?

TottieandMarchpane Sat 19-Oct-19 10:04:44

Have something sweet and sit down to catch your breath.

WhatTheChuffJustHappened Sat 19-Oct-19 10:05:26

Wrist is fine, there's a purple lump there but it stoped throbbing after an hour.

I'm not calling the police. I'd rather just leave him that cause that hassle (for myself).

MrsWooster Sat 19-Oct-19 10:05:35

Call the police. Not because they will do anything very much this time but he WILL do this again...

endofthelinefinally Sat 19-Oct-19 10:05:57

Report to police.
Photograph your injuries.
Seek medical help asap and get injuries documented.
This will escalate.

Youngatheart00 Sat 19-Oct-19 10:06:00

Take pictures of the injury and save them in a folder on your phone. It’s important

WhatTheChuffJustHappened Sat 19-Oct-19 10:06:15

No right now it's a very unhealthy relationship. We are going through a very stressful period and he's handling it very badly.

Our older kids witnessed all this as well.

FredaFrogspawn Sat 19-Oct-19 10:06:54

You really need the police then.

WhatTheChuffJustHappened Sat 19-Oct-19 10:06:55

Yeah I've got photos.

Will it escalate though? First time in 21 years?

Youngatheart00 Sat 19-Oct-19 10:06:58

Do you have any family or friends you could go to? Hotel maybe won’t offer you the comfort you need.

Alwaysgrey Sat 19-Oct-19 10:07:03

Is there a nice dh? Because the one you have sounds like a nasty cunt.

endofthelinefinally Sat 19-Oct-19 10:07:14

You must report this. If you don't, if you separate, he will have unsupervised access to your baby.

WomensRightsAreContraversial Sat 19-Oct-19 10:07:25

21 years of not being violent doesn't excuse this ever being okay.


Wildorchidz Sat 19-Oct-19 10:07:29

Are they ok? They must be very shocked

madcatladyforever Sat 19-Oct-19 10:07:45

This is disgusting behaviour, there is simply no excuse.
I'm also living in a run down log cabin at a holiday park in a very dodgy town while my sale goes through as my new job is 300 miles away.
Yes its incredibly stressful but it's stressful on the entire family not just him and his behaviour in front of the children is inexusable.
Even if you don't intend leaving him call the police now.
It will give him a lesson he deserves to learn that it is not ok to abuse your family when you are stressed.
A night in the cells will cool his heels.
Also go to your GP or the police station and get your injuries recorded in case there is any further nasty behaviour.

MarianaMoatedGrange Sat 19-Oct-19 10:07:49

OP if don't do something, he'll do worse next time. Think of your DC growing up witnessing this abuse.

DrinkFeckArseGirls Sat 19-Oct-19 10:09:39

It will be a mistake not reporting it. Your relationship is dead in the water. He is spiteful, what if he goes for full custody.

madcatladyforever Sat 19-Oct-19 10:10:02

Reading one of your posts above, I can assure you that once violence has started it always escalates unless you put a stop to it immediately by calling the police.

thethoughtfox Sat 19-Oct-19 10:10:56

We had one experience as children with a 'scuffle'/ smashing up house situation at home. None of us ever completely recovered and were frightened and wary of our father ever since.

C0untDucku1a Sat 19-Oct-19 10:11:01

Fucking hell op. Of course it will escalate. It already has! He has gone from making everyone afraid to speak on a sunday, to everyone afraid of his mood all weekend, to Being physically abusive.

Phone the police and end the relationship.

RushianDisney Sat 19-Oct-19 10:11:23

You should call the police to log it at the very least, you DH sounds unhinged in his behaviour, he endangered your baby. Protect your children from this man if you won't do it for yourself. He repeatedly, purposefully violently injured you, that's not normal.

C0untDucku1a Sat 19-Oct-19 10:12:41

And op, you will start to end the relationship at some point when you realise how unpredictable
And dangerous he has become, and there will
Be no record of this incident. He will lie and make out youre poisoning everyone against him just because you are over.

Id be tempted to go to get my injuries looked at too. Gp, minor injuries etc.

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