This might be long and maybe I should have done a name change but fuck it.
I shall start from the begining so that you see the full picture too.
Basically a friend and colleague of dh (who is now a good friend of mine), her dh died just over a month ago and she has a dd who is the same age as our ds.
Anyway we went for a day out together on Saturday and we said lets look into a holiday for us all next summer. Somewhere like Centre Parcs maybe, nothing too pricey.
So when we got back I got a quote and we were looking at £400 for 5 days away. Then we start looking at Eurocamp hols and the like.
Dh is then bit by the holiday bug and starts looking at allsorts. He then goes on about going snowboarding kind of jokey and I said no way because the new baby will only be 6 months old.
Skip to yesterday and I had gone to bed with retched SPD pain. While I'm there, he's been pricing up holidays to Canada in January.
Last night he starts telling me how it only costs 1.5k to go to Canada to stay in an executive lodge. I say dont be so stupid, new baby will be 1 month old. My response "Oh yeah I didnt think about that".
So to cut a long story short is that he wants to take dd on his own in January and leave me with a one month old baby, ds who will be 16 months and 2 dogs just so he can go snowboarding, not to mention the week snowboarding he's going on in March too. I told him how unhappy I was about that but he still has every intention of going.
Anyway, cue massive argument. I lost it big time and got really upset because he just wouldnt see that I didnt want him to go because of the new baby.
He said he doesnt see what the big deal is, babies only sleep and drink, I need to see a Physciatrist and sort out my mental health issues
Today we have barely spoken but argued again before he went to work.
He said he hated me, wants to go to the solicitors, he doesnt see why he should have to live with my inadequcies (sp, i know its wrong), house will go on the market, i have to cancel the family get together for ds's birthday next week because he hates my family oh and if I dont sprt out my mental health issues by next year hes leaving.
So basically I said that if thats what he was thinking then theres no point in staying around, I would go to my mums and get my name on the council house list and just go.
I told dh I wouldnt be here when he comes home tomorrow from work but I called my mum, she spoke some sense and I am still here.
But tbh I dont know if I want to be.
He will come home tomorrow and still not listen to me or reason and all I can think is why should I live with that.
He's said alot of the things above before and I know alot of it is reactionary but I get so sick of it.
Without making excuses I am struggling atm with anxiety but ffs I'm 24 weeks pg, I think I'm still in shock about being pg so quick and I need a bit of sodding support. Not a dh who thinks its ok to bugger off and book a holiday when our 3rd child will be 1 month old.
So someone please talk some sense to me and tell me what you'd do cos I feel so buggered up atm.
Am just gonna throw my children into bed and then I will be back.
Thank you.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
What would you do, because tbh I really dont know.
Nbg · 13/08/2007 19:11
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