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Been dating a guy

(6 Posts)
XOXOGOSSIPGIRL Wed 11-Sep-19 16:16:50

So I've been dating a guy for the first time in a year after being in an abusive relationship for 3 years I finally left and took the time to concentrate on myself and self love and Im at the best place I have been in a long time.

Anyway this guy is lovely, like everything I've wanted he takes me out we laugh we have generally good chemistry and the sex is amazing! But I don't find him attractive in the face and I just feel like my feelings are not progressing to be honest I feel a little numb. I don't want him to not be in my life honestly such a great guy but why do I feel numb? And am I not progressing feelings? Normally when dating I would just feel it straight away but I don't with him and it actually makes me sad ☹️

chickenyhead Wed 11-Sep-19 16:35:37

Hi OP

When you have been accustomed to abuse it colours your whole world unfortunately and you can end up in a pattern of only finding bad boys attractive etc.

The offer of a truly equal relationship may feel alien to you, because you are used to being with someone who devalues you.

I would recommend that you do the freedom programme

Orangeleavez Wed 11-Sep-19 16:49:49

You just don't fancy him.

Gemma1971 Wed 11-Sep-19 17:02:49

How long have you been with him?

You say it is amazing with him physically so you must be attracted to him? You must fancy him for it to be so amazing???

Dieu Wed 11-Sep-19 17:31:23

Aww, I'm so sorry, but we can't just force these feelings. I sometimes wish we could though! You seem to really want to make it work, but are just not feeling it. This isn't your fault at all, but it might be kinder to let him go.

browngirl40 Wed 11-Sep-19 21:35:13

Hmm if you don't find him atttractive in the face, I get that but you have chemistry with him? I've not had that before.

How long have you been dating him and whats your gut telling you?

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