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Doing this in the name of love...would it be crazy?! (Lighthearted)(5 Posts)
Had no idea what to put as title! Obviously it’s not a love situation and I’m not totally deluded.. although when you read on you might question my sanity!!
I’ve been online dating for about 2 years. I have met a lot of people who wanted to progress things with me but I’ve bever been that interested. About two weeks ago I spoke to someone on the phone and it was great. I like him a lot...bearing in mind we haven’t yet met!
So here goes...he lives 220 miles from me...about a 3.5 hour drive. We must have matched when I was working in his city, which I do every couple of weeks. I stupidly said I am in his city next weekend. He then suggested cooking for me at his place, or meeting for lunch if I preferred. I don’t know why I said I would be in his city when I had no plans to be...!!!! I think I wanted to fish for an early date as I knew I was away for a few weeks after the weekend and then we wouldn’t actually be able to meet for a while. I am going away for three weeks after this weekend (holiday) and then he is away for two when I get back. So I want to meet him before I go.
It’s gojng to cost quite a bit to drive or get the train and obviously it will take up the whole day just to spend a few hours together. I’m aware we could meet and there could be absolutely nothing between us. But then I also don’t want to be messaging and building up a meeting in my head for weeks on end.
I could tell him I’m actually not in the area...Again I know it was stupid to have said this in the first place! But I know he has plans generally over the weekend so he will be unable realistically to come to me. I don’t want him to think I’m coming all that way for him either so want to maintain that I’m generally in the area.
I usually do the bare minimum to meet someone as I have little interest and whilst I would never go and see him without him also making the effort, I feel like I want to do this in this instance. Is this crazy?!
Not necessarily. I think it’s sensible to want to meet soon rather than spending weeks building up an idea of someone without having met them. Also, the whole thing could lose momentum if you wait for weeks before meeting, and/or he could meet someone else in the meantime. If you wouldn’t be missing out on anything else that weekend, and would enjoy the time reading/listening to stuff on the train, I don’t think it would be crazy to go.
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