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Anyone else sick of dating?

(23 Posts)
simbasab Tue 11-Jun-19 16:51:21

I'm seeing someone and some days they speak lots and I feel like we have a good connection then the last two days I've felt like they were distant.
I've text and they've replied but not much conversation.
I'm exhausted and I can't figure them out.
I'm not gonna text anymore today.
Knows where I am.
I just don't get why some days they are chatty and others hardly anything.
Anyone else fed up ?

Helpmeltb Tue 11-Jun-19 17:19:53

How long have you been seeing them? Are they not just busier some days?

I'm fed up of blokes being clingy or just after a shag. Where's all the normal ones?

onemoresmartie Tue 11-Jun-19 19:39:24

Also fed up of people not putting effort in, not speaking day to day but still wanting to go on dates it baffles me!
I am going to be more honest and upfront I think

OusideSea Tue 11-Jun-19 20:31:44

Yes. I’m so fed up with it! Had a thread the other day on something similar.

It is exhausting flowers

Swirlsanddragons Tue 11-Jun-19 21:04:16

Oh no. I've just searched this entire site as I'm now ready to start dating 😭 please tell me it's not all bad lol

simbasab Tue 11-Jun-19 21:23:00

It's depressing me.
You think they are into you and boom gone.

simbasab Tue 11-Jun-19 21:23:47

He has been texting a lot tonight so probably was just busy
He is hot and cold tho

Busytizzy Tue 11-Jun-19 21:25:23

I agree, it's rubbish. And then if you do actually meet someone it could work with, you're constantly wondering if/when they're going to go off you or disappear.

simbasab Tue 11-Jun-19 21:39:27

@Busytizzy that's me exactly ...you don't enjoy the fun times because your always on edge waiting for it to be over.
Every time he doesn't text for a few hours ...I'm worried.

LocksMyth Tue 11-Jun-19 21:55:27

I'm done with it all.
I love being single so much now, nothing makes me want to put up with all the mind games any more. If someone comes along in real life sometime in the future , then fine,but right now I can't be arsed with it all.

Jade74 Tue 11-Jun-19 22:00:26

Couldn't agree more Lockmyth OLD can seriously mess you up if you're not strong and don't take it too seriously I can't be arsed either waste of my time. Too many sleaze bags cheaters and liars too old to play stupid games he either texts normally Bec he likes you or doesn't bother. Maybe he s not a big texter or tired or busy .

simbasab Tue 11-Jun-19 22:05:26

I'm 34 now and feel like this is it.
All the decent ones are married by now.
I was a lot happier before I began dating.

tierraJ Tue 11-Jun-19 22:12:12

I'd say I'm scared of dating rather than sick of dating.
The last man I dated became obsessed very fast so I dumped him, now I'm scared I'll get the same issue again.
There are some weird men out there & at first they seem normal....

simbasab Tue 11-Jun-19 22:53:28

@tierraJ that doesn't sound good.
How was he obsessed ?
Clingy ?

HarmlessChap Tue 11-Jun-19 23:15:02

Wow, having just had the separation (amicable at this point) chat I guess that I'll be doing the OLD thing eventually. Last time I was single mobile phones were the size of a house brick and we had dial up Internet.

Going to have to scour these pages for the do's and don'ts with OLD I guess.

Lau247 Tue 11-Jun-19 23:29:03

In the same position started seeing a guy who was very keen at first and had been trying to get me to meet up with him for years (hadn’t seen him for a long time ) everything seemed great although I did think he may have been love
Bombing me.. we slept together and he has completely changed disappears one day very hot next day completely cold..

I pulled him up on it and he made me feel like I was being too much and annoying him.. only to do it again a few days later. This is someone I’ve known along time and not someone from OLD

I’m recently single from a bad Rship (few months ) and this has made me feel like complete shit.. if I pull off from the guy he comes on strong and then when I respond he goes cold.. the games are so depressing !

tierraJ Wed 12-Jun-19 11:04:08

Simbasab he was constantly messaging to tell me I belonged to him & he loved me after 3 short dates.
I hadn't felt there was much of a spark but was giving him a chance as he seemed nice & was attractive.
The messages were overwhelming & scared me off. Maybe some women would like that behaviour but it wasn't for me.

Onemansoapopera Wed 12-Jun-19 13:49:12

OP, give your head a wobble will ya! If you were my friend I'd have to give you a little shake. You worry after a few <hours???> That's obsessive and you need to reign it in. All this texting crap is ruining stuff but you can choose not to be part of it by just realising that people have other stuff to do? Surely you do too?

AverageGuy Wed 12-Jun-19 13:57:47

If you are interested, there is a specific dating thread. Lots of people in similar situations, who offer support and help: -

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3604484-Dating-thread-161-Can-anybody-find-me-somebody-to-love?

smurfette1818 Wed 12-Jun-19 21:41:35

Onemansoapopera second to that!

OP with dating in general (online or otherwise), the starting point needs to be "I don't want anyone who doesn't want me". If he doesn't appreciate you, he doesn't deserve you. He can disappear anytime he wants, you still glad to be who you are and can simply continue your own life unscathed.

He may be busy, and so are you. You have your own life, a life that lights you up, whether or not your life include him. A life full of meaning and well lived.

Bluerussian Wed 12-Jun-19 21:55:56

Can you not just enjoy dating without thinking it might be a serious relationship? I loved the fun of dating when I was not married, I had no long term expectations, just enjoyed the time I had. Made friends, learned all sorts of things. Eventually I did date someone who I eventually married but it was quite different, we both knew from the outset that 'this was it'.

ShatnersWig Wed 12-Jun-19 23:15:43

I've not had a date in 7 years. I'd love to be dating.

RantyAnty Thu 13-Jun-19 02:19:21

I don't know how long you've been seeing him but it shouldn't be this hard.

@Bluerussian has the right idea. Just getting out and meeting people without thinking this is the one.

I would find more guys to date and more social activities to be involved in, then you won't be so worried about this one guy contacting you or not.

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