DP of 5 years. We have 1 DC together (3yo) and I have 4 DC from previous marriage.
Relationship always a bit up and down. He would regularly lie to me about little things and could never really stick a job(great catch, I know 🙄)
2 years ago he got a job that was ideal for him but hardly paid and he was working 50+ hours. It caused so many arguments and in the end he drifted away from us. Spent more time at work.
October 2017 I got diagnosed with breast cancer. Horrible scary time, I had chemo x6, radiotherapy, double mastectomy and hysterectomy. He was a complete letdown during this time. He left on numerous occasions. Would leave me after chemo to go to parties etc. He was awful. He last left in feb 2019, after my hysterectomy. I told him via email that I would no longer accept this and he either stayed and tried to make a go of it or didn’t come back. He chose the latter.
FF 3 months and I’m doing great. Enjoying being single, most of my mental health problems have disappeared. I’m coping
With FT work and childcare, which I never thought I would be.
He got wind that I had been on a few online dates and went potty. He said he has finally realised what he lost etc etc.
It’s been 3 weeks of madness, he has been crying, unable to get up, has not gone into his work. He has now been prescribed anti. D for which I think is for his underlying MH issues where he buries his head in the sand, denies it all and makes up lies to cover his back.
But now he is recognising all of this and all that he has put me though. He wants to change and be better for me and the DC. He has done a complete 360 with his thinking.
My issue is, it’s a constant reminder of that horrible time in my life when I really needed him and he was a twat. I feel resentful that he is being the person I needed then, now. I feel like I would be on edge if I ever
Needed him again. He wants to work through all of this. Go to counselling etc etc. Even said he’d get a new job.
I do love him. I am a stronger, more resilient person now, So would you risk it again?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Would you resume this relationship?
Sharpandshineyteeth · 01/06/2019 19:55
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