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Would I be out of order...

(39 Posts)
melting Wed 18-Jul-07 22:58:08

I'm thinking of asking my partner (who stays here on a weekend) to start getting a wash before he comes to bed when he's here.

At the moment he only washes and brushes teeth in a morning and does nothing before going to bed, I have this thing about other peoples germs and it grates on me to see him getting into my clean bed without washing first, especially when I see him wiping his eyes on the pillow cases etc.

When he leaves I have to put clean sheets and duvet cover on the bed.

I know it probably sounds really petty but its driving me mad, would I be out of order to mention it to him? Should a person be expected to wash twice a day?

pyjamaqueen Wed 18-Jul-07 22:59:28

I'm sure if it's what you want he won't mind. Tell him he'll sleep better if he's clean.

newlifenewname Wed 18-Jul-07 23:00:11

I am sort of with you on this, but wiping his eyes on the pillow case???

KerryMumbledore Wed 18-Jul-07 23:01:32

I always wash my face and brush my teeth before getting into bed.

He doesn't brush his teeth? Tell him they'll rot and give him bad breath.

Or tell him you'll do nasty things to him if he showers first....

melting Wed 18-Jul-07 23:01:46

Yeah he wipes sleep from his eyes onto the pillow, or basically just wipes his face on it. Probably sound like I'm taking the piss now but I am genuine. It's not like he's a dirty person, I'm just a bit anal about personal hygiene and don't know if I'm being OTT

pyjamaqueen Wed 18-Jul-07 23:02:29

I suppose ultimately if he doesn't want to wash, you can't make him do it, but I'm sure he'd hate it if he knew you were thinking that about him.

jura Wed 18-Jul-07 23:02:57

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

newlifenewname Wed 18-Jul-07 23:05:27

I'm anal about it too, which is why I said I'm with you on this.

If generally clean then I think no shower but if sweaty or dirty with dirt (from tube/garden, etc.) then shower.

Do you shower after sex? I sometimes struggle with the grubbiness afterwards but no problems during.

Sorry if TMI but it is quite important I feel - obsessive cleanliness can be life hampering. I know.

newlifenewname Wed 18-Jul-07 23:06:42

You can't go to bed with dirty teeth - EVER! Even when drunk.

Okay, maybe occasionally if drunk.

KerryMumbledore Wed 18-Jul-07 23:07:00

Does he smell?

melting Wed 18-Jul-07 23:07:08

I do shower after sex yes, more beacuse of the thought of someone elses sweat being on me than anything else .

melting Wed 18-Jul-07 23:07:38

He does smell a bit sweaty occasionally but generally no

newlifenewname Wed 18-Jul-07 23:09:23

Ahaaaa! Now, let me ask you, do you 'mind' if sweat drips on you from someone else? particularly if while having sex?

I do but lord only knows where this problem arose from.

melting Wed 18-Jul-07 23:11:39

oh god yes, it actually makes me feel sick.

Its wierd because house-wise I'm not the tidyest or cleanest person...it's just personal, things that touch me, people-germs.

I think he makes me think of him as being dirty because he's constantly farting and burping which drives me loopy

KerryMumbledore Wed 18-Jul-07 23:12:12

God no,

Personally I love a bit of sweat in the act.

Though I would normally be a germ phobe myself...

newlifenewname Wed 18-Jul-07 23:16:01

I am fine with mud, and exterior dirt and mess but not body stuff.

Saliva can offend me also - in certain contexts.

This is interesting talking to you about this.

Eye yuck I can understand. Snot is okay with the children but not adults.

What about that dribble of wee that you know is always there on a man? I prefer no peeing between shower and insertion. Ahem, better shut up now.

newlifenewname Wed 18-Jul-07 23:16:38

I'm serious btw!

melting Wed 18-Jul-07 23:17:46

You sound just like me! I actually put off kissing incase there is more saliva than "neccessary". I seem to be getting much worse lately

moondog Wed 18-Jul-07 23:18:37

He sounds less and less attractive frankly....

newlifenewname Wed 18-Jul-07 23:21:37

Oh geez! You are me/I am you!

If I don't look then I don't see how much saliva I might be dealing with and so can kiss with abandon. If I look first it puts me off.

I tend not to breathe also in case I can smell anything identifiable.

Don't suppose you are a BJ fan. No need to answer.

Those people who speak and have lots of mouth froth or spray - I can barely cope.

And that creamy stuff people get on their lips in the corners. Oh, I nearly pass out.

melting Wed 18-Jul-07 23:21:57

he has a rotten tooth too which I always imagine to be crawling in germs which is another thing that puts me off kissing him.

Thing is he's noticed that I avoid personal contact and I don't know whether to just be honest about it all or will that he heartless?

CharleyBunnifredNubble Wed 18-Jul-07 23:22:31

More saliva than 'necessary'

Necessary for what? What about semen, how do you cope with that, especially if it gets on your sheets?

moondog Wed 18-Jul-07 23:24:21

Rotton tooth???

OMFG

melting Wed 18-Jul-07 23:24:31

I can't think of anything more nausiating than giving a bj to be honest...which again doesnt go down well! LOL

melting Wed 18-Jul-07 23:26:13

if semen gets on the sheets they go straight in the wash and it's actually quite difficult for me to "forget" what happened to them when I next go to use them.

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