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Is it a bad thing to be envious of anothers happiness?

(4 Posts)
kutilputil Sun 15-Jul-07 00:11:37

im sitting here moping around feeling like crap and wondering why i had to be the unfortunate one in this pathetic relationship!while DH is upstairs snoring his head off...yes we argued today but he seems very unaffected by it...even after telling me that after 12 years of being together (we met when i was 18!)he has come to the conclusion that we need to find our own separate ways....and weve only had the one child!im fed up and tired and feel suffocated by him mean ways and words....because at the end of the day i love him and cannot see a future without him...and he knows that...pls excuse me, i may or may not post this but this is a good way of making sense of my thoughts...since my son was born he managed to get a job and now that is his only job in life and i now take care of DS (obviously) and the household chores, cooking cleaning, washing with almost no help from him...i dont even demand a time away from the two of them and he manages to get a few sessions of sports in a week!i have so much to do and so little time and im tired...and comming back to the point about envy...i just had my brother and sis in law come round...parents of three kids...and without them today!they went out to dinner and looked so chilled out...it seemed like they had no kids...im not tired of my son but of life...of how i look and feel and my relationship with my hubby...i hate misery and that is all i have, for a long time now!is there a point in going on?maybe not

eyesfront Sun 15-Jul-07 10:00:42

You are acting like a doormat, and doormats get trodden on. Sorry for the harsh words but I speak from very personal experience.

'I love him but he treats me like s*' is one of the saddest stories - if he doesn't love you (and it doesn't look like he loves you) and you stay with him you will always be miserable.

This is horrible for you - I am so sorry

escape Sun 15-Jul-07 10:05:07

make alist - sky blue thinking.
What do you REALLY want?
The ironing pile done, an extra hours slepp, your hair cut, a million pounds?
Seriusly, narrow the list, think ahead and plan. I'm not the greatest housewife in the world and when domestic stuff is on top of me, I'm areal misery guts abiout anything and everything,. Getting through some of this stuff leaves me with aclearer head and I can then positively tackle te 'bigger issues' . Do something, anything, to clear your head (take walk with your child, clear the clutter - whatever) and really take stock rationally of what you are getting and what you wnat from your rellationship and put your needs first.

kutilputil Sun 15-Jul-07 10:24:56

yeah, i undersdtand all that but its very hard to stop caring and let things just happen...now he has planned to take ds out alone without me and im thinking of letting him prepare everything for the first time!but i know he will fail so i have already started to help him as i feel only my son will miss out!and i still want to talk it over and resolve the issue but is it him or are all men stubborn and pigheaded STUPID and oh, selfish?

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