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'us' time

(4 Posts)
Nosher Wed 04-Jul-07 21:23:03

feeling pretty fed up because dh and I never seem to get any time together at all. DS is 14 months, and I suppose we knew it was going to be hard in the early years but I feel like we're two flatmates who have a child in common. DH is a wonderful dad, but works odd hours, he's usually coming in about ten at night which is about the time I go to bed (his body clock is totally different to mine, night owl, lark blah di blah.)
As a result we never spend any time together when we're not parenting. We were together a long time before having our son, and I really miss the times we'd go camping, out for the evening, or just lie in bed all day. Our relationship has gone out the window. If we do socialise it is separately as someone has to be at home with the baby, and as his friends keep similar hours to him he stays out until 3am. I'm usually in bed by ten pm. Any suggestions (not a meal out - he hates restaurants!!! And I think it's a bigger problem than can be solved by a fancy dinner!)

WideWebWitch Wed 04-Jul-07 21:25:30

Do you have any family nearby? Could they help by having the baby for anight? If so, ask!

It's like a bomb going off in your relationship, having a baby so some of this is pretty normal ime. You need time together to remember why you're togther I think but I realise it;'s easier said than done.

hurtwife Wed 04-Jul-07 21:42:14

It is hard but so important - find a good babysitter or call on friends and family. It is hard to wrench yourself away and you will probably worry yourselves stupid about DC but it really is worth it. How about a local collage student doing a childcare course - they will be willing to do the all night bit as it is great experience. You dont have to go far - the camping sounds great - but not at the moment with the weather!!

How about cinema. Even just a night in pampering each other with a nice bath ect can do wonders.

Dont feel you are being selfish it really is worht it.

We have just been away for the first time abroad without kids (in 15 years) it was so good we are going again in nov. It is hard to organise - we have 4 but really worth it.

Being a family is hard but well worth it so hope it works out and you 'find' each other again

MoreSpamThanGlam Thu 05-Jul-07 11:09:59

What about a picnic, when the weather pics up? Or a family pub that will allow kids, and one of you drive?

I know exactly how you feel xxx

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