Husband called me the N word during an argument , am I overreacting

Mialostina · 2019-02-14 12:29:39

Long time reader but first time poster because I really need some opinion on this I am a black woman married to a white man , we have been together for 6 years and had our ups and downs He is extremely jealous , so the other night we were celebrating my sister's birthday and when we went home he complained to me that I was flirting with my sister's husband ( YUP you read this right. I was apparently seducing my brother-in-law). Which is a lie. My husband thinks me being nice and polite means I am flirting. For exemple if I say thanks to the waiter while we are the restaurant he will go " You want to f*ck him and leave me right ?" So that night he was shouting , telling me that he will never forgive me if I cheat on him. I tried to reassure him by telling him that I love him and will never want anything with my own sister's husband. He kept on shouting so I decided to go to bed and that's when he said to me : " You damn n*ggers are obsessed with sex and can never be faithful". Oh lord , I just went " excuse me ?" which he replied by " Yes you heard me , I thought you were different but you're just a basic n-word". I cried all night in the bathroom , and in the morning he came crying and apologising. He bought me flowers and kept on saying he was sorry ; he made a terrible mistake ; because he loves me and the idea of me leaving him terrifies him. " It's just a word". To me it's not just a word , I am so so hurt. Coming from a stranger would already have been bad but from the dad of my children... that's even worst He never insulted me before , and never said anything racist. I am so torn about this situation. We have 2 daughters so I don't want to ruin their family life. What do you think ?

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